This is an insane thing to ask for advice about. I’m struggling to understand what I’m supposed to do here, if I should even be concerned, or if I should just let it be?
I (50M) have a daughter (15F). There’s nothing really wrong with her other than the fact she’s a little moody as all girls her age are, and she is a great girl. Very sweet and personable, takes care of her school work, talented – but now that she is approaching a certain age I wondered if she was starting to be interested in boys. Or maybe girls because she’s made some questionable comments here and there.
Now, my daughter is a bit special as in she gets EXTREMELY obsessed with a fictional media. First it was Deltarune and she was obsessed with the bird dude and had posters full of him and him only, and she was always quoting him. Then it was some game about Time or something and she fell in love with the eyepatch guy with the witch hat, and cosplayed him and always said that she loved him more than anything else. She begged for a plushie of him (which she has)
I was fine with that since I thought she was just being a silly kid.
I was wrong. What I’ve seen now is worse than anything else. I got her Roblox because her sister (12F) had it, and she started playing a game called Dandy’s World. She told me she liked it, and then, she got a character called Finn. Ever since then I have been losing my mind worrying about her. Her life is purely about Finn. She loves Finn and believes her loves her back “in his own fishy way” according to her. She’s decorated her room with posters of Finn, and her drawing book is full of drawings of Finn, or him doing something, or him and her sitting together. She is head over heels for him. I set her up with a work friend’s son and she declined because she was “taken by Finn”.
She quotes him all the time. “Do you REEL-Y think that way, Dad?” “Did you know starfishes aren’t fishes at all?” “Dad, this new character insulted Finn’s joke, I’m going to ask the developer to delete them from the game.”
I am not sure what the hell any of this is supposed to mean. Frankly Finn isn’t a very handsome guy. He’s cute for a cartoon but he’s a drawing of a fishbowl. No muscles, no abs, no six pack, I don’t know what she sees in him but I try to be supportive of her and Finn. She even begged her sister to write a fan fiction of her and Finn going to an aquarium. The good thing is that she’s very interested in marine biology now because of him.
I’m just absolutely lost on what to do. Finn is not a real person. He will never be ther for her when disaster strikes. He can’t comfort her. He can’t provide her what real people do. I guess I’m just worried that she’ll be in a tough time someday, and realize that maybe Finn won’t support her like someone real would.
What should I do about this?
Comments
Lol dude, chill. IMHO, this seems like a typical teenage girl phase. I went through a phase like this with some anime character back in the day. But for real, don’t freak, it’s just part of growing up and finding interests. Maybe illustrate to her that a real BF might offer more than Finn in some areas, but don’t push it. At least she’s got an interest in marine biology now, right? It ain’t the worst thing she could be obsessed with online. Keep supporting her. Adolescence is weird but she’ll grow out of it, trust me.👍🐠 This is what I wish my parents heard when I was in her shoes.
Sounds like she might be on the autism spectrum. 12 you old girls will become obsessed with a fictional or celebrity crush but 15 is a little old for that.
At 15, it’s quite a good one, sounds very safe, inexpensive and inoffensive (by that, i mean, better than drinking to excess and anti-social behaviour).
Something as well about a fan-fiction of them going to an aquarium. Sounds pretty creative, and im sorry, but at 15. If disaster strikes, surely she’ll have her family who’ll be there to help. When I was younger, I had toys, and in my early teens, my dad gave me a digital camera and showed me how to make short clips, so photograph, move the figures slightly, photograph, and repeat. It gave me something to do at that time.
The setup with work friend’s son is an overstep IMO. If she’s not interested in dating, leave her be. Sounds like she’s doing well in school, and yes, I’d be concerned if it was affecting school work or if she was an adult calling in sick to work for this, but she’s a kid enjoying childhood.