I used to have a group of friends in first year of uni but the way they were was disgusting, no one liked each other so i used to hear them bitch about each other behind their backs and then go back to calling each other babe, love and shit. I was never comfortable in that group, and i never talked more than i needed to, like whenever they had a discussion behind someones back i left cuz i felt uncomfortable, so it was kind of like i was the friend on the sidelines because I didnt wanna get too involved, i still liked them individually tho. I was always there for them despite all of this, cuz thats what friends do. It all started when I got a boyfriend, the sweetest most beautiful boy ever who put me before everything else. And all of a sudden I only talk to them when hes not there, like hes in a different campus and i only see him during lunch break which is an hour and we dont even live in the same place, we live like 2 hours apart, so i only see him once a day for less than an hour and Im with the girls for the rest of the day, but they just started ignoring me, not leaving me space, yelling absent even when i came to class, moving away when i try to sit next to them, I even asked if i did smth wrong and apologised but they left me on seen. I asked but they just said oh you spend too much time w him, we dont wanna be the friends who you come to when youre alone. Like that never happened. I even used to not be with him for 2-3 days straight because on these girls needed me. I became a bad girlfriend in this process but I was the one who was pushed aside. Its so frustrating and idk what to do, its like im always there to get yelled at by them because i never say anything back. And its making me very sad, i feel like im just someone who is unable to make friends. Is this something everyone faces when they enter a relationship or just me who fucked everythingup?
How to make female friends?
r/Advice
Comments
Girl, those were fake friends from the start. Real friends celebrate your relationship, not punish you.
Nah you didn’t mess everything up. Those girls just weren’t real friends if they ditched you over having a bf. Focus on meeting people through classes, hobbies, clubs, places where you’ll find ppl with similar interests. Real friends won’t make you choose between them and your relationship
HELL YEAH I GOT U!!!! I love making friends!!!
First tip: join some clubs if you can. This will get u in a place w like-minded people who u have a higher chance of bonding with. Facebook groups and community events are also great places to meet people.
Second tip: find one thing in common with someone in a class/outside – clothing, books, music, the class itself. Commonality is KEY.
Third tip: Just start a convo with someone u think you’d like, whether it’s in class or in a cafe or on the street. People aren’t typically against talking and meeting new people (just make sure they aren’t wearing headphones).
Fourth tip: this one is for more if you like to go out. Buy cigarettes, or ask for a cigarette when you go out. It’s an automatic conversation starter, and u know they’re stuck outside w you until they finish their ciggie. Again, that’s only if you go out and you’re comfortable smoking. It’s not a necessary step to making friends!!!
They are toxic. You need to make more genuine friends.
Does your school have some sort of online message board/website for events and things? My niece made all of her first year uni friends this way, took the pressure of face to face introductions away.
Everyone here has told you that they’re fake friends and how to make new ones, so please take note of the personality traits that bothered you for future reference. That will be your saving grace with people who have ill intentions as well as keep you comfortable and happy in future relationships.
Girl c’mon at this point just leave this friend group…..u will be alone but u will be at peace of mind ^_^