Hello, today I woke up in a hostel and next to me there was a most likely gay man who told me I would look “hot” at the moment I woke up. I didn’t really realize so I asked him again what he said and so he repeated. In that situation I was a little confused so I only thanked him but it made me feel uncomfortable, because I slept topless and I thought I sent the wrong signals (while sleeping?).
In other situations in which I was getting only compliments I didn’t think as much as now about it. Mostly because he called me hot while in a pretty vulnerable moment and I can’t fully accept it as a compliment.
How would you feel in this situation?
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i’ve been hit on by both sexes my whole life. I don’t feel comfortable if a bloke does it, cause i’m not gay, but i don’t care that much.
peeps complimenting eachother is ok, voyeurism is not.
It happened to me a lot of times and it hasn’t always unfolded in such a “polite” way. I think every man should experience this a least once in a lifetime, that way they will probably understand what women goes through when they are arrassed…
Personally makes me uncomfortable but no biggie if it persist grossed out/ little angery
Don’t overthink. Yes, it was perhaps tasting the water, but it was just a compliment. But I can understand that the situation directly after the weak up was a bit overwhelming.
Yeah i’d tell him preciate it and keep it moving. I’ve been complimented by gay men before and imo it’s fine to acknowledge it and show basic human decency yet still not entertain it or show interest. Keep your responses short and simple. If you see him trying to escalate or take it past that, that’s when you check the behavior.
I once got called hot while being in a sauna with a most likely gay man in nothing but a towel and I was shirtless. I just gave an awkward thanks and just kept vibing to the music in my headphones and didn’t give it another thought. I think he picked up that I didn’t care and he left it alone. If he continued to escalate it I would have reacted differently but he didn’t so it was just kinda whatever to me
The first few times it was genuinely flattering, but it became insulting after a time.
I have been called good looking by gay women. It doesn’t bother me at all but I’m straight. I usually just say thank you, but most of them knew I was straight already. It’s not really difficult for women for women, but it is.
Indifferent
Flatterd.
All good till it gets creepy and what you described would make most straight men, myself included, uncomfortable.
Have been, took it as a compliment. Any compliment is nice to get 🤷🏼♂️
Flattered?
A little flattered but mostly uncomfortable.
I’d feel hot. Feels good to be called hot.
Especially so since a gay dude once said how they’re more picky than women. Don’t know if it’s true, but I’ve found I’m quite popular with men, so I might actually be hot.
Being observed by a stranger while asleep is a bit iffy to me. That I would just try to take at face value, but it would also raise a few red flags with me.
The same way if I were a woman with unsolicited compliments.
I’m straight, but I get hit on quite a bit by gay men but not nearly as much by women. By women, no matter the age, it’s either very complimenting or, at the least, endearing. By men, it bothers me, but I don’t show it or make a deal of it unless they are inappropriate (which is extremely rare).
How were you vulnerable?
You were in a hostel in shared room, so you know other people will be sharing it with you.
I have had this experience several times and I just politely tell them that I am straight. Honestly I’ve never had any pushback. All of them have respected it and moved on.
If the guy was watching you while you slept only to say you’re hot when you wake up is weird AF.
I’ve been complemented by gay people before and it’s cool, but this creeps me out a bit
So far I lucked out and none of them made it awkward, took the rejection well, were respectful. So it’s fine. Compliments feel good.
A compliment is a compliment. Sure a beautiful woman’s compliment is going to have more impact, but again a compliment is a compliment.
A bj is a bj
If i was you i would be more worried about the guy watching me sleep than about him calling me hot.
I’d just do finger guns at him and wink.
No idea, probably would feel weird and say thank you like you did or just nod and simply go away. Only insistence would annoy or even anger me.
Flattered.
That being said, as a straight male, I once got my ass grabbed at a gay bar, and I was not okay with it.
Had it happened in any other bar/context, it would be grounds for legal action…no double standards, I don’t care where you are, that is NOT okay.
It does get annoying after a while. I think in your specific situation it would be pretty off-putting. Having a secure place to sleep makes all the difference sometimes.
I’m gay and this sounds quite weird to me?? Like I compliment my gymgoing straight friends on their muscles all the time but I don’t hit on strangers while they are still half asleep wtf
I’d be super happy. Someone thinks I am hot.
I’d feel like I was complemented. If they think I’m hot, that just means I’m doing something right.
Compliment is a compliment. I’d thank for it and would compliment something about him. It would definitely be s boost for the day.
I would just say thanks. Just like any other compliment. No drama here.
I’ve had it happen a few times. I don’t sweat it. I smile and pretend I don’t get it. Only one person got offended. That’s on him.
Good
Seems like if it’s anything it’s someone making a flirty comment in passing to see if you’re interested, but otherwise a benign interaction.
I’d probably feel a bit caught off guard in that moment too—being half-asleep and shirtless makes anyone feel vulnerable. But honestly, being called “hot” isn’t offensive, it’s a compliment—even if it’s not from someone I’m attracted to. As long as there’s no weird pressure or boundary crossing, I’d take it as flattery and move on. Confidence is knowing the difference between attention and threat.
Would be pumped lol
I don’t care if a gay man hits on me, as long as he respects that I’m not gay and therefore I won’t reciprocate.
As a gay man, I think he shoulda kept his mouth shut. It might be ok to give a compliment in a public setting, but giving a compliment in an area where the guy is partially, or fully nude, is highly inappropriate. Of course, I grew up in redneckville Alabama, and giving a straight guy a compliment was a good way to end up in the hospital.
Happened to me about 20 years ago, but I still occasionally smile about it!!
Guy approached me at a house party full of bikers (normal motorcyclists, not “hells angel types”), and he approached me, I was always in Awe at the courage… I’m 6ft2 with resting bitch face and the is no way he could have known my reaction!
I was genuinely flattered, told him he was stunning but I am straight, we had a few beers and then the flow of the party put us In seperate areas,
A compliment is a compliment
I’d feel flattered.
I’ll take any compliments.
I know I’m hot.
As long as you respect the fact I’m not interested, and I’m far from a dick when I reject people, we’re good.
A compliment is a compliment. I’d gracefully take it, regardless.
I’d assume he was coming on to me
“I’m flattered. Also get your eyes checked. Also I’d appreciate it if you could stop creepin. Thanks bro. “