This is gonna be vague. You know when there’s just so much to say but you don’t have the energy to speak or type anymore? Everything is pointless. I’m just so done with this world, this society, and with myself. The only thing that keeps me going is God. My faith holds me above water, but I wish God would just take me already. Before I go to sleep I always wish that I won’t wake up the next morning. I’m so fucking sad, and so fucking tired, of everything. Where do I go from here?
I 20F, really don’t want to be alive anymore.
r/Advice
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Just play Pickleball and you will feel alive again. Trust me on this!
Find meaning in the small things like spending time with family or adopting a cat or dog as a companion then also try spend your time doing things you enjoy such as hobbies or interests and revolve your time around things your passionate about and interested in and slowly tune out the bad thoughts and centre yourself around positivity to replace those feelings and emotional thoughts that life isn’t good and eventually you will find life gets better because your doing positive things.
leaving society aside, why do you feel this way?
If the one thing holding you above water is your Faith, hold on tighter to that. Schedule time every day that you can spend with God, dig into his word and do things that you enjoy where you feel him the most. I know from experience that feeling like this is temporary. Try putting some effort towards some things that bring you even small a glimmer of joy. Also, not sure if you’re in the place where you could do this or if you’re an animal person, but I know for me, my dog pulled me out of some of the worst headspace I’ve ever been in. Maybe you could get a kitty or even a hamster.
As a 25yo who did not want to live at all from 19-22 and doubted it would ever improve (like for real). Try to find some happiness in things other than religion. Maybe get on antidepressants, therapy, good habits (force those despite how it feels, it will feel like shit for a sec). At some point you will be shocked by how things would feel
I’m in the same boat as you are my guy. I don’t know if it’s just the fact that it’s summer and I’ve got no where to go or anything to do, or the fact that the future seems so pointless with the way the job market and the economy is going. I have no idea why I feel so hopeless right now, but I know it will fade away and I’ll be back to my old self again. Then the cycle will repeat. Life is funny
This might be at odds with your theology, but I think you need secular therapy to help you process your thoughts and emotions yourself rather than trying to pray them away or outsource them to God. I mean that respectfully. I’m glad your faith is keeping you afloat but in my experience the church is loaded with people who do not get the mental help they need because they’re told to just “give it to God,” “lay it at the feet of the cross,” “pray about it,” etc, when an actual therapist or the proper medication could be the solution they’re missing out on. It can and will get better. Don’t give up. Also this might sound really toxic and petty, but sometimes I think if I had no other reason to stay alive, I would at least do so, so that (insert name of person you can’t stand) can’t outlive me.
Sounds crazy but psychedelic’s/DMT/Ayahuasca/ETC. spend the money and go to Mexico, go to Puerto Rico. And immerse yourself like this “trip” is your religion crunched into a few days, believe. I have known so many military guys (seals to grunts to fighter pilots) and here’s the shocking one: normal people, that have gone there and came back a whole new version of themselves. Every single one of them has contemplated suicide from different religion backgrounds and all came back a new version of themselves. You have to remember the way you view the world is your own interpretation. Your own emotion. Which is validated. Always validated. But life and burdens have created weights on your feet, your heart and your soul. You feel this way because god brought us here to experience life and the path you chose is winding. Good. Enjoy it the breeze, pop the top and feel the wind. Our time to close the book of life is coming in a second. So take half a second to enjoy the other half. I have faith in you, I can feel the sorrow in your message. I pray for you and we are all human and I care for you. You seem like an incredible human willing to express your emotions. We need you in this world. Truly. I hope you find peace in this life, as we will all find peace in the other. we just need the same faith while living rather than focusing on what’s after. You just need to catch your balance. We need you here!
Get yourself a pet. If you like animals at least. I have 2 cats, and they gave me so much more purpose in this crappy world
Also, you might need more time in nature if you aren’t spending much time outdoors. Look for public land or parks or just anywhere you can go to observe and soak up little bits of nature. Focus on the sunlight, the leaves, the rocks, the sounds of birds, whatever. It can be so healing. That’s what has helped save me when I’ve been at my low points. Lately the Merlin bird app has brought me stupid amounts of joy and dopamine. Just press record and it will tell you which birds are singing around you. Building your Lifer list can be a fun distraction and a great learning tool. I’m rooting for you!!!
You sound like you have depression. Why don’t you seek some help?
Antidepressants can help, CBT therapy can help. Exercise and sleep helps a lot.