(Excuse my grammar and word uses, English is my second language) I (21M) started talking to this guy (19M) almost 3 weeks ago, and we hit it off extremely well through text. I’m the type to playfully flirt but I held off from flirting as all the previous people I talked to before this guy did not respond (well) to the flirting. However, he caught me by surprise by flirting with me first and I took it as a sign to flirt back, the conversations were genuinely so fun and I was getting my hopes up. So we decided to meet up for a first date a few days later (He was busy for the majority of the week), and again I think we hit it off extremely well. We had great talks, lots of back-and-forthing and it was such a good first date. He told stories of his family, favorite teachers and close friends, and with each utterance I could hear his empathy and love eminating through. I was completely charmed so of course I told him I loved listening to him speak and admitted that I didn’t contribute much near the end of the date because I was completely allured, but he was okay with it and told me that on the second date I should be the one talking more instead and I agreed. We both decided to go on a second date but because of uni stuff, the date was repeatedly postponed. However, we still hit it off really well through text during this time, still the same back-and-forth and flirting so the delays weren’t that detrimental. Let’s skip forward to the second date. At first, nothing seemed out of the blue, we exchanged hellos and stuff, nothing strange, but then he told me that he had a really bad sore throat and may not be able to talk much during the date, of course I was like “It’s okay!” “No biggie!” “I’m the one talking today”. The date we agreed on was a meal at a restaurant then drinks at a coffee shop. The restaurant we agreed on was a small shop selling “banh xeo” (A Vietnamese pancake, really good btw y’all should try if you ever go to Vietnam), but it was so loud in there and the “seats” were so so so uncomfortable (we sat on the floor with our legs crossed), so I told him that I genuinely could not talk and conversate at all in here, promised to have a meaning conversation once we got out of there and he seemed to be okay with that (not happy but not angry or sad at all). However, this restaurant was genuinely horrible, we waited for probably 30-40 minutes for our food and halfway through waiting they informed that they ran out of the food we ordered (the banh xeo was still really good tho). During the downtime, since it was still really really loud and I was really uncomfortable and also kinda hangry so I did not talk at all and he didn’t talk at all with the sore throat and all. I could see his demeanor slowly devolving to boredom during the wait so I thought to myself “I’m gonna try and initiate something when the food comes out” and I was coming up with topics and stuff to talk about. Let’s skip forward to when the food comes out, so the food got here and I was so relieved “FINALLY I can stop being hangry and have AT THE VERY LEAST some small talks instead of awkward silence”, so the plan started, I asked him some questions with the intent of starting something, but he literally ignored everything, but I brushed it off as him also being hangry and bored from me not talking at all, so I told him to just eat and we would talk once we were done eating (no response btw). During the meal, banh xeo is usually wrapped in rice paper with veg, he kept wrapping the food for me, but he did not look at me once, just stared at the food and did the wrapping for me (I did wrap for myself too btw). It didn’t feel like he wanted to wrap to flirt with me or showed me that he cared, but rather it seemed like he was trying to rush the meal, I was like “I guess the silence and my initiation attempts were too unbearable for him”, but I also agreed with that so I brushed it off again. So we finished eating and we were headed to my bike so I could take him to a cafe, while on the bike, I asked “Are you mad at me? For not talking much when we were eating?” and he said no, I felt so guilty for semi-ruining the meal. On the road, he suggested ditching the cafe and going to a local park, I was like “Yeah, that’s fine, as long as I get the chance to talk to you” and on our way getting there, I did try to initiate something again but he did not respond again… So we got to the park, we found a bench and sat down, he seemed disinterested but I did promise to talk and so I started talking, I told him that I actually go to therapy and I told the therapist about him, hoping he would ask why but he didn’t, he just ignored it and did something on his phone. I was bummed but still proceeded, I talked about why I go to therapy and what I talk about in therapy but again, he did not respond at all. So I told him that while I understood that his throat was sore and he couldn’t talk at all, you could at least try to engage in the conversation, but he didn’t respond again. So I said I was sorry for not talking much during the meal even though I promised to do so, but he again said “It’s okay” then did something on his phone again. So I told him “If you don’t want to be here, I can take you home right now, I get it, you can’t talk”, I was being really apologetic but he wanted to stay. At around 9:30 PM (after about 45 minutes in the park), he offered me to go to West Lake, a wonderful place for getting some air, something that I feel like we desperately needed. On the ride, he started opening up a little more, he told me he didn’t like eating and not talking at all and ofc I agreed and apologized, told him that it wasn’t the place to talk. He knodded (probably, he was behind me) and we hit it off pretty well on the bike. At 10:30 PM, I took him home and told him “I want this to work out, so be patient with me and know that I still have so much to learn” and he knodded then headed inside. Skip forward to today, I still chatted with him, apologized for last night again and he seemed okay with it, told me to talk more next time. I ofc agreed then asked him for his “bank account number” to split the food bill that he paid for last night. I repaid him and added a little bit more and told him that it was “compensation” but he seemed mad, genuinely mad, and told me that if I wanted to compensate, next time open your mouth. I’m still interested in this guy, and would love to get to know him more but I feel like I messed this up…