I, 21F, found my boyfriends, 23M, reddit profile. I opened his comments to find that he has been interacting and commenting under porn subreddits. Some of the originally creators of content he’s commented under have even replied. I’m not sure how to really respond or react to the situation. I know it makes me extremely uncomfortable reading that my man wants to fuck other women. I’ve never had a problem with porn, but something about how interactive it is bothers me. Am I thinking about it too much? How should I approach this situation, if at all?
I, 21F, found my BF’s, 23M, reddit page
r/Advice
Comments
Porn straight up is a problem and needs to be more readily recognized as one. Not only is this a form of cheating by looking at other girls hence why your so uncomfortable. But it is a terrible addiction as well. I would look into asking him to stop and calling him out on it as well as alternatives to see if the addiction can be broken. Look into porn addiction, it’s effects and how to deal with it. Maybe get a therapist or seek counseling on how to deal with it in an appropriate manner.
tell him you’re uncomfortable with it and explain your side. that porn in it of itself doesn’t bother you, but it makes you uncomfortable for him to interact and comment on it, as it feels more personal. depending on how he responds from that, you can go from there.
He’s been hiding it from you and I’m sure he feels guilty. You need to just have a conversation with him and also decide for yourself if what he did crosses YOUR line. He definitely is doing something sneaky.
Talk to him about it
If it bothers you, maybe you are not compatible. These things are a spectrum. Maybe try and find someone closer to your position on it
If it bothers you then you have the right to tell him that. If you don’t you may not be able to get it out of your mind.
You should tell him to show you his inbox. He’s probably chatting too. I’m sorry. I know a lot of guys here with wives and gf’s who are heavy on the porn subs. Most are addicted and also don’t think it’s cheating cause it’s “not irl”.
You’re lucky you found it. Reddit now lets you hide your comments and the subs you follow. Also a lot of girls will never know that their guys have a Reddit page.
Have you confronted him?
Is this a habit he’s been continuing after you got together? If he’s been hiding it from you, it’s probably because he’s ashamed of it. The real question is: do you think he should be ashamed of it? Let that answer guide you if you decide to talk to him about it, but at least be open to hearing him out.
Watching it is one thing, interacting with them is another. Pornstars are still people, this isn’t monogomous. You aren’t overthinking. This isn’t normal. He’s having sexual interactions with other women. Just because it isn’t in person doesn’t make it any less of an issue. Confront him, if he stops he stops. But whether you can mentally power through it is a thing on its own. It’s not uncommon to grow resentment from things like this, you don’t want to live like that.
I’d recommend r/loveafterporn
If he’s interacting in comments, it’s likely he’s getting nudes and sexts in his DMs. I’m sorry but this isn’t love, he has a problem.
This could happen either because your pussy doesn’t satisfy him – loose, smelly, etc – or because he requires excitement through roll play, etc that you do not provide.
Looking for a friend.
Honestly it would be game over for me. That’s straight up disrespectful and cheating to me.