I (22F) Just found out that my gf (21F) has a very strange fetish, and I don’t know what to do next

r/

My girlfriend has always been a fairly blunt person. She’s sex positive and speaks her mind about whatever topic, regardless of if other people might find it embarrassing to talk about. She doesn’t hide her phone from me, but I also have never wanted to go through her phone, and I’m the same with her.

Recently, though, I was setting up youtube on our new smart tv and she logged into her account so we could get videos recommended easily, and that’s when I saw it. I had gone into the search bar, and seen recommended searches of sneezing videos. They had descriptors in there that popped up in all of them, like ‘rapid’ and ‘fits’.

Now, my girlfriend had made jokes before about ‘getting her porn from youtube’ and I never really pried, because I assumed it was just a one off joke or something about something obscure. 

She was obviously embarrassed and asked for the remote back, where she turned the tv off. She wasn’t frantic or anything, but it was clear to me that she didn’t want me to see that. 

She explained to me that she has a fetish for sneezing, not herself, but watching others do it. Men or women, she doesn’t care, but she’s bisexual to begin with. She told me that she’s been this way since she was a little kid watching cartoons and not understanding why she was so interested in the episodes where characters would get sick.

I just told her that I accept her interests and that I wouldn’t have been grossed out if she had told me earlier. She told me that someone had dumped her before over this, and she was looking for a good time to tell me. I assured her that I’d never do that, and that was the conversation.

It’s been a few days now and I just don’t really know how to continue with the information that I have? I’m not considering dumping her at all! But I just feel like it’s a bit awkward, we’ve been dating for 4 years and she never told me this before. Plus, am I supposed to act on this at all? Or would that be creepy? I’m honestly kind of scared I’d do something wrong somehow, if I tried to act on it. She had mentioned there’s forums and all sorts of stuff just for sneeze fetishists, so maybe I’m ridiculous but it almost feels like there’s a community for it, and I’d be intruding.

Maybe I should just swallow my pride and ask her what I should do?

Do any of you have experience finding out that your partner was into something you weren’t? Especially if it was something so out of left field? Did you do anything with that information, or did you think it was best to leave it be? Thank you for any advice you can give!

Comments

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  2. XxLogitech98xX Avatar

    You shouldn’t ask her what you should do, that’s for you to decide. It’s basically accepting her for her or using what you know now against her.

  3. GreatResetBet Avatar

    It’s snot all that weird, and you seem to know we don’t achoose our kinks / fetishes.

    The biggest challenge I could see is that when you’re feeling like absolute garbage sick is when she’s gonna want to get up all in that.

  4. SpiritWalkerTorak Avatar

    Keep some pepper by the bed

  5. Restomeri Avatar

    As someone who has also been told their fetish is weird and abnormal by an ex I can definitely relate to the not sharing part. Although 4 years is a long time. She might have been too in her head about it. If it doesn’t bother you, just treat it as any other piece of information you know about her 🙂

  6. MistifyingSmoke Avatar

    …Sneezing? Thats enough Internet for today I think.

  7. OrmEmbarX Avatar

    This is probably the most benign kink I’ve ever heard of

  8. Anxious_Reporter_601 Avatar

    Yeah just talk to her about it. It sounds like a fairly harmless fetish I wouldn’t get too hung up on it.

  9. Handsome_Gangster Avatar
  10. HombreAmarillo Avatar

    The human being is extraordinary.

  11. julessrose Avatar

    Let her have this side of her. You can reassure her every once in a while but if she wants to open up more about it with you she will.

    For Valentine’s maybe dust up the house

  12. ChokinKhiken Avatar

    If sneezing is all there is then what’s the big deal imo. If I were you I would lean into it. What’s the worst that could happen? A more satisfying sex life for both of you? Who knows but to be put off by it seems such a waste. I could see if it was something more heinous but it doesn’t get more benign than sneezing. Ask her if she wants to explore it together and go from there.

    Who knows you may just grow closer.

  13. Patient-Ninja9059 Avatar

    Is it a kink or a fetish? Because there’s a difference, from my understanding a fetish is something a person needs in order to finish and a kink is something they enjoy but not necessary for satisfaction. (Correct me if I’m wrong)

  14. OkNefariousness7860 Avatar

    First of all who tf watches porn from Yt

  15. JustAGuyTrynaSurvive Avatar

    Well I can call it day. I’ve learned something new. Now I’m going to be weirded out if I have a public sneezing fit, wondering if somebody is watching me and getting horny.

  16. ChickenScratchCoffee Avatar

    Just leave it alone.

  17. Lazy-Ad-7745 Avatar

    Buy a lot of pepper and flowers and go at it. Just clean the bat cave so no rockets go flying out.

  18. RustyVagabond Avatar

    Sneeze all over those titties boiiiiii
    👃💨( • Y • )

  19. DanceWonderful3711 Avatar

    Buy some black pepper and strap yourself in.

  20. wpnsc Avatar

    Get to sneezing and enjoy 😉

  21. Cheap_Bullfrog_609 Avatar

    I would throw pepper on my nose or some shit so I could sneeze a lot as a foreplay, hahaha. It’s such a benign kink that I wouldn’t be grossed out.

  22. supposeimonredditnow Avatar

    This is extremely sweet and not a problem. Get a pet you’re lightly allergic to and enjoy bone town!

  23. Zealousideal_Cap1568 Avatar

    Hi, my partner also has an odd fetish, and its something thats easy to misconstrue, and I want to say that he helped me get over my awkwardness by telling me that he didn’t expect me to participate ever and I didn’t even have to think about it ever again. I chose to be open minded, and while its not something that turns me on, knowing it turns him on turns me on XD We engage in that kink often and it keeps us closer together emotionally because he knows his self-induced shame is safe with me.

  24. Old-Law-7395 Avatar

    “Get the ground pepper out, we partying tonight baby”

  25. panic_bread Avatar

    This isn’t a big deal at all. Just continue on with your life.

  26. undercoverdyslexic Avatar

    Just reassure her that you love her and aren’t going anywhere over sneezing. I’d think about and communicate any boundaries around sneezing/realizing a fantasy. I’d be thinking about not trying to jump my bones when I’m sick/allergies, but maybe I’d be fine with making myself sneeze in the bedroom like 2 times a year kind of thing.

    I also think this might become a fun Pavlov’s dogs kind of thing where you get an erection from your own sneeze at a poor time. I find that part kinda funny.

  27. icametolearnabout Avatar

    Hope you have hayfever

  28. Interesting-Loss34 Avatar

    Just casually get hay fever near her then

  29. Yaamen11 Avatar

    As with all things sexual between partners, open communication is best. Speaking as someone who has a specific fetish, it can be helpful for your partner to be open to discussion. This may not be something you’re able to accommodate, but getting on the same page is the first step in feeling better about it.

  30. MysteriousDudeness Avatar

    I’d be sneezing my ass off.

  31. Leading_Silver2881 Avatar

    🧂black pepper🧂
    👃mint salve 👃
    Idk…figure it out, just keep sneezing away
    Doesn’t need to be completed to work out…

  32. Any_Thanks4414 Avatar

    she just gets turned on by random ppl sneezing?😭i cant imagine my partner getting wet/ erect anytime someone sneezes even if it isnt under their control

  33. MagicalJack60 Avatar

    Pluck a nostril hair. Always does the trick for me.

  34. mere_persiflage Avatar

    You could try. “Hi babe. Is that something you want to discuss?”

    Things we’re drawn aren’t always things we want to actually experience or act on.
    Sometimes we just wanna watch and chat with others about what’s hot or not.

    Also I’m a longtime married lesbian. We don’t have many surprises for each other, but still sometimes it’s like “I didn’t know you felt that?” Talk, consider each other’s feelings, and even big scary things can work out. Not easily but there are things I thought would end us that we got through. What can you live with?

  35. KC_187 Avatar

    Have you sneezed around her before? How did she react?

  36. The_SHAMbolic_One Avatar

    This hay-fever season must be killing her!

  37. theyawninglaborer Avatar

    Well when you’re in the mood, all you gotta do is sprinkle some pepper in front of yourself and start sneezing in front of her 😭😂

  38. SoulRebel726 Avatar

    All I can say is that I wish my wife was into my morning sneezing fits lol. Maybe find a way to get yourself some nice seasonal allergies and see what happens.

  39. theREDcardCA Avatar

    Just look out if she starts hanging out with some with a photic sneeze reflex, aka ACHOO syndrome. Lulz