I 22F think i am a bad partner to my boyfriend 27M because of a depression episode he had one month ago. How do I know if I really checked out of the relationship?

I already posted about this, so sorry for that but now I am stuck…

Me and my boyfriend are 3 and a half years in the relationship. One month ago he had a episode where he literally hated himself. I tried to be there for him but every time he had a episode like that before he didn’t do anythim for himself to feel or be better. This time when he was bad I said to him as it is, that he say stuff but never do them, that he doesn’t do things that he likes because some stupid people told him these things are stupid, that he never fixes his problems he just cry about them. It was really enough for me and I feel really bad because I did that in that moment when he was vulnerable.

For a month, we had a lot of fights. He said to me that noone likes him and if he try something and doesn’t succeed he would hate himself more and he would be a even bigger loser. I said to him that he must do something about his mental health and self image and that he must do something he likes and that makes him happy otherwise I can’t be there anymore.

I don’t want to be that girl, I want to be there with him if he is willing to do something with himself, I love him so much, but for the whole month he didn’t do a thing that will be a good thing for him and his mental health. I begged to him to go to a therapy, he doesn’t want to, he doesn’t even do things that he like, he just sits at home, watch a tv and play games and that is his whole day.

We don’t go to dates either, I asked multiple times to go somewhere to take a walk and see something new, we both drive and we can go anywhere for a little money, he say that he wants to and when the day come I am so happy and I get ready and go to him and he always has some problems and we go to walk around his block…

I started to say goodbye to this relationship a week ago, I cry everyday because I don’t see this is going anywhere. I realised a life I want to have for myself, I grew up with him and just now I realised I don’t want to have that static life. I want to go for a walks, on a dates, I want flowers, I want someone that will love me and be better for me and himself everyday like I try to be for him. He is my biggest support and he really loves me but he doesn’t want to support himself and I don’t know why. I want to see some new things, alone or with someone, but I realised that I won’t have that kind of life with him

And yeah, as I was saying goodbye to our relationship and begged him one last time to consider doing something, he said to me that he is going to start learning for a car mechanic from next week and he was trying not to tell me and not do it as he did every time. Now I have some hope but at the same time I don’t know if I want a life with him and I feel like a bad partner because this happened when he was in a bad state.

Update: also he is starting to work on his money management so I see improvements but I don’t know if I believe them…