I’m currently 28 weeks pregnant, am less than 5 ft tall, and have gained just about 25 lbs so far and feel as though I look drastically different which is a given considering the circumstance. I’ve had eating disorders that I’ve worked hard on correcting recently to make sure I try to give my baby everything he needs. I’ve had self esteem and confidence issues since I was probably 12 but have been able to look at myself in the mirror and be proud of myself on occasion. My partner has always been unbelievably supportive and kind and patient from the get go (2 yrs) and I still get that support at this point in time. Physical touch is my love language, cuddling on the couch, holding hands, intimacy, the whole thing. Since my belly became noticeable I’ve noticed a significant decrease in physical touch and intimacy. I get it, it’s not really appealing or stimulating and I’m sure knowing little fella moves around causes discomfort. I recently went through a bout of self esteem and self confidence like this a few weeks ago but didn’t feel as low as I feel now. I bleached my hair and got my nails did to make myself feel better but that was temporary “fake it till you make it” type of thing. This resurfaced because of the lack of intimacy and physical affection and I peeked at his phone (which I have NEVER done throughout our entire relationship) and found that he watches porn at least 1-2 times a day. I’ve walked in the bedroom on a handful of occasions and it’s not watching the porn that I see as an issue but it hurts knowing he can look at other women daily and get that pleasure and release that I want to be a part of and that I want to be the cause of too. The last time we went through this he explained that he’s afraid of hurting me and some of the body changes are a little uncomfortable to him. He tells me daily how much he loves me and how pretty or beautiful I am. Sometimes the words don’t feel like enough anymore when I barely get a greeting when he comes home or we cuddle together every few days or so. I’m well aware my hormonal changes very much impact my feelings at this time but I just don’t know how to navigate and handle it for at least 2 more months. I feel broken and I just am looking for advice or maybe comfort in others with similar problems or predicaments. Edited note: this man is incredibly loyal and upfront, has never burned me or given me any reason to distrust.
TLDR: Sad pregnant lady just wants physical affection and intimacy from supportive partner but can’t seem to initiate or interest physical intimacy or contact due to being preggy.
PS- This is my first reddit post so i’m sorry in advance if i’m lacking anything I’m supposed to share
Comments
Say it straight out: I won’t beg for physical affection or sex, but I am here. I’m having our child and I need to feel loved and appreciated; as do our baby who can feel the discomfort of its mother and lack of affection from its father
I would also ask if it is fair that he gets to masturbate and release himself by himself and without you? If he wants to watch porn he should do it together with you, not hide like a teenager
I wish you the best and a healthy baby