I recently went to a party with my boyfriend. It was a party of mutual friends. It was nothing fancy, just a get together with drinks, weed, music, some pizza.
We went and I had some drinks. I rarely drink, but when I do I become confident in myself. I’m usually not a confident person so I tend to highly control myself and match myself to each persons personality so I am likeable. When I drink, I don’t care if people like me, I am just me.
Eventually the party went to people dancing in the living room. I had a few drinks and I was feeling myself. So I started dancing too. I was having a blast. Our friends loved it. I worked up a sweat dancing, had a great time, I was happy.
Afterwards my boyfriend was quiet. I thought something was wrong and after asking multiple times, he said I embarrassed him by my dancing. He said I made a fool of myself and him. I was upset I did that. I felt like I danced wrong and maybe provocative and didn’t realize it?
But the next day I asked my friends to send me the videos they took. I watched them. I was dancing like napoleon dynamite to be honest. I asked the friends who had videos and a couple others if they thought I made a fool of myself. They said that they loved it and really enjoyed me being myself and letting go. Some of them had videos and sent them and I also inspired others to dance like that with me.
It’s been a few days since the party and my boyfriend still thinks I was wrong and was an embarrassment and I he was cringing watching me. Maybe I let it too loose. I the embarrassment for my cringe dancing?
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Nope! Dance away and don’t worry about having a good time with your friends.
There’s nothing wrong with having a good time and dancing like a dork with your friends. If it embarrasses him, he should have another drink and join in, or not watch.
Ditch him. He can’t handle to good fun times he is embarrassing himself. Always be yourself in a healthy way. T
He sounds incredibly immature
Your vibe sounds great! Dance however you want!
Life is too short not to dance!!!
Break up with the guys… luckily he’s just your bf and fall in love with someone who loves the way you dance and encourages you to do it.
no, if they joined in with you and loved seeing the real you. girl be your true self, as someone older. fuck what people think of you, it’s how you think about your self that matters. stop trying to be like others to be liked, be yourself and you’ll find your true tribe.
You didn’t mess up, necessarily. You got drunk, decided to dance & looked a little silly doing it, and that was the end of it. Sounds like you were in a place where this is acceptable behavior (dancing, acting a bit boisterous), with friends who either didn’t mind or found it entertaining. And sounds like you didn’t even find it regrettable on a sober re-watch, so everything there is perfectly fine to do. You weren’t causing a disturbance, you enjoyed yourself, and those I think are the biggest things that matter.
Your boyfriend I think is allowed to express that he finds it embarrassing, we all have behavior we’d prefer in a partner, and he may prefer people who don’t act outwardly boisterous or willing to get silly. Might be something you can compromise with him on, and it might be something that indicates a larger incompatibility. For me it would kind of depend on how this topic was broached, and the way he’s communicating this; if he’s not being overly berating or controlling, it could be something you can discuss and work out some expectations between the two of you. But it might just not be worth the effort; it will not be any fun for either of you if he’s either constantly upset or you’re constantly appeasing him and neither of you are enjoying yourselves when going out together.
Compromise where you can for consideration of your partner, but keep in mind there is a fine line between being a workable partner, and sacrificing bits of yourself to fit someone else’s image of who they want you to be. Good luck 🙂
He sounds like no fun at all.
The only time I’ve had a problem with my girlfriend dancing when she started Twerking. I was not a fan of that.
Don’t let what he said ever stop you from dancing like no one is watching. Letting loose and bring yourself is important. I’ve missed out on way too many things because I was worried about what other people would think of me
The question is why he feels comfortable insulting you or was threatened by your confidence. The next question is how much longer you will allow his ill treatment.
He’s the definition of “You must be fun at parties.” Keep dancing OP and maybe dance all the way away from him.
What? You’re not allowed to have drinks and dance at a party. It embarrasses him. Damn, girl. You Do You. You did you. You did not, I repeat, did not mess up. He kinda sounds like a controlling asshole.
Life is too short to be stuck with someone who thinks dancing is embarrassing.
You’re dating a weak man.
Sounds like fun I always love drunk dancing
Doesn’t sound like he likes you very much….is he super critical of you in other ways as well?
Well you said you were feeling like yourself when you danced. And he didn’t like you like that. It’s a bit of a red flag that you’re not ultimately compatible.
Fuk no. You, do you
Even if you were dancing like Elaine from Seinfeld, it sounds like you had fun and didn’t do anything wrong. He sounds like a stick in the mud
You were at a party dancing with friends and not trying to pick up sailors in a dive bar. Sounds OK to me.