I (27f) just started dating this (31m) guy who is very gentle, kind and overall seems like a great guy. He’s not sexually experienced and doesn’t have a lot of friends even, but so far he’s been nothing but kind.
He needs a lot of teaching which I don’t mind and I’m physically attracted to him… But I can’t stop feeling like I’m not that into him. Like when we talk we talk for a while, but he’s not that funny/he only makes me laugh once in a while.
I got out of a very toxic and abusive relationship about 5 months ago so I know this is healthy compared to that, but I don’t feel overly into him even though he’s exactly what I need…
How did you know your significant other was right for you?
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Two things can be right.
He can be a good guy
You can also not have chemistry with him
First off, 5 months out of an abusive relationship is probably too soon to date yet
Secondly, I personally could never get serious about someone who didn’t make me laugh
It sounds like you need to take some time to fully heal from that very toxic and abusive relationship.
I am 38 and I have had many meaningful relationships in my life. At 37 I met my person…when it’s the right person, the doubt almost completely vanishes. There is still nervous anxiety about losing her or making sure I am the best partner I can be for her because she deserves it, but I know she’s my person.
In my opinion… If you’re on the fence about someone, its because that someone is not the one you need.
The one you need wouldn’t include you debating and doubting, having a list of pros and cons… Instead, everything would be pros and you would be ecstatic to be there, no second thoughts about it.
He can be a great guy, nice and kind… But often times that simply isn’t enough. It only carries so far in a relationship. Need to have that, meanwhile include the electricity on top that you require.
I feel…seen…thank you so much for sharing