Now ex-gf is interested in the romantic lives of celebrities, for some stupid reason. I often ignored it, but this one was ridiculous.
She showed me a picture of Selena Gomez’s partner. She then asked me why she chose him, and told me that he wasn’t good looking.
I told her that maybe she finds him attractive; accordingly, having unique looks doesn’t make someone a bad partner.
She said that I’m putting words in her mouth, and that I’m lucky to be with her.
I left her apartment and blocked her.
I gave context, but I’m unsure if it’s just pointless backstory. Sorry.
Comments
NTA. Sounds like this is not a good fit and you are both better off.
If it’s normal for your arguments to escalate this quickly then yeah you’re probably better off apart…
That sounds like a strong reaction on your part. I mean unless there is more? You could have joked back and said “are you saying I’m not attractive?” or “Yes, I am lucky to be with you but did you just call me ugly?” It seems weird that you’d take offense to a commit like that.
NTAH. She sounds vapid and superficial. You are also allowed to end any relationship for any reason you find valid. You did so, and without yelling or belittling her.
There was no need to escalate like that, she seriously had superiority issues and you saved yourself a lot of trouble
NTA, you’re dating, you can break up with her for any reason. And her negging you and telling you she’s doing you a favor is a good reason to not be with her.
YTA for worrying about what an ex thinks
No fuxk that bitch
Good for you! The fact she’s so caught up in celebrity couples and social media drama says a lot about her. She’s clearly not in sync with reality and can live in her fairy tale world now. You dodged a bullet by leaving and blocking her.
You dodged a bullet, she’s superficial. But, couples tend to mirror, not perfectly and exactly. For example, if a couple breaks up and say the woman says “he manipulated me by lying about how much he makes, he made less than me”. I assume she too manipulated him in some other way so his side would be “she weighed a little more and didn’t tell me about her crazy ex”.
All this to say, self reflect on why you chose someone superficial, assuming you want someone different next time. My assumption is you chose her for superficial reasons.
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How did she even make the leap to you being lucky to be with her? I thought you all were talking about Selena Gomez?
Why are people like this
She obviously feels as if she is sort of prize
I say you’re lucky to have dodged a bullet
NTA. Dating is like a trial run and you two didn’t mesh, you have no reason to give someone for breaking up.
That seems like a quick-fuse relationship. Maybe some overreaction on both sides. Of course, if you weren’t happy with her to begin with, maybe you used this moment as the straw that broke the camel’s back.
Most people have brief moments of jerkitude every now and then. We can forgive occasional lapses in judgment. If she was criticizing someone’s looks, and that seems to be something she does regularly, then I can understand not wanting to be with someone insufferably shallow.
It also depends on whether or not her saying that you are lucky to be with her was a lame comeback over a tiff or whether she was actually trying to say that she’s better looking than you because that puts in the nail in the coffin on shallow.
With so many interesting and decent people in the world, passing up on shallow people makes sense. I think that shallow values has risen because of social media (although even before social media, there was a fair number of vapid people out there), so it can be more challenging to find the good ones – but good people are still out there.
Sounds like an exhausting afternoon OP.
Definitely NTA. You gotta have lines and limits. She showed her character. Id say you dodged a bullet. She sounds like the type to be around until she finds something “better”. No loyalty. She crossed a line for you and you left. Maybe she’ll learn to do better.
NTA dodged a whole lotta headaches
Nta. Dont be “lucky” or “an option”. At most be grateful to have been given the chance to show what youre worth but never be lucky theyre with you or one of their options.
Nope. you did the right thing.
You both sound toxic lol ESH
My bf and I are constantly telling each other how lucky we are to have the other, not the other way around. What a rude thing to say! NTA imo.
You’re luckier to be without her.
NTA, you spared yourself a lot of grief with a narcissist that only sees the superficial.
Selena Gomez is tubby and would be nothing special if she werent famous.
You did the right thing. Tell her your luck ran out and you’ll be going to Walmart the next time they have a sale. LOL.
Benny Blanco is a wonderful human being.
Your gf sounds shitty and shallow.
I would say leaving was the right thing to do: that was pretty fucked up. At the same time, blocking her without trying to talk to her at least once is a bit of a copout. Let her explain, once.
However, be very, very suspicious and very, very assertive. Even something like “Explain why should I speak to you ever again?” is not out of the question. However, maybe she listened to friends and/or whatever. You never know, but be cautious of manipulation of course.
Dodged a bullet. Why would anybody want to be with someone that thinks they’re better than you?
You’re lucky to be with her because she’s way more attractive than you. That’s what she’s saying. She sounds vain and shallow. You made the right call. NTA
Well, you could be petty and say, “I looked past the fact you weren’t very attractive to still give you a chance. I can’t be with you if you can’t acknowledge or appreciate the sacrifice I made to do so.”
NTA She sounds like a very superficial person.
fake
yeah there’s a 100% chance you’re leaving out a lot of details here lol
Hell yea. I love to see when people have self respect today. It’s rare.
NTA
As a woman who doesn’t really seek out information about celebrities, but does not avoid the celebrity information that crosses my path, I will answer your ex-GF’s question re: why is Selena with her fiancé/what does she see in him- from all appearances (because I don’t know these people) he seems to actively champion her, thinks of her needs and tries to make her life easier by fulfilling them, and values her happiness. They seem well matched and like they both think they are the lucky one to have snagged the other (which is the secret to a happy relationship).
This sounds very close to the I broke up with my GF because she called me Beta Boi.
NTA for breaking up with someone like her. Next time choose wisely.
Good for you
ESH.
There’s got to be more to this. Breaking up over a single comment like that is wild. Making a comment like that is definitely inappropriate though.
But honestly, if you don’t feel like you can have an actual conversation, which suddenly walking out implies, then breaking up is what’s best for both of you.
Is she 15?
Nta. Of course it depends on the tone somewhat. It doesn’t come off as teasing to me. And if it were more playful, I doubt he would just up and leave without a word.
If she truly felt that way, she would ditch you for some one on her level. So nta.
He’s a hugely successful record producer…that’s why.
If she thinks you’re beneath her, that will never change, only get worse. Life is too short to be “settled for”. Go and find the girl that wants you as much as you want her, she’ll be out there somewhere
NTA, she seems pretty shallow and insecure.
Only tangentially related, but I once had a friend who was objectively much more attractive than her boyfriend (now husband). So she’d often get hit with the line “you could do better” based solely on their physical looks; she hated it. She’d always answer with something like “How can I do better than the man of my dreams?” or “How can I do better than the man I love?”
NTA. You are in a contract. You can break up for any reason.
That was both rude and ridiculous of her. In my opinion, anyone who says ‘you’re lucky to be with me’ without it being an actual joke (not a ‘mean thing disguised as a joke’) is not someone you need to be with. This is just a superiority complex and you’re better off without that.
You weren’t even putting words in her mouth: She told you ‘he wasn’t good looking’ and you replied ‘maybe she finds him attractive’ and that ‘unique looks doesn’t make someone a bad partner.’ That was just you replying to a point that SHE made about someone else’s partner.
She is the one who escalated, and then said something that is pretty offensive.
NTA.
NTA that sounds like a very exhausting relationship
This doesn’t even look like a real world conversation, are you all are so used to follow celebrities, that you speak to each other like some bad romance movie? lol
Also you could’ve come up with a witty response, or ask if she was joking… Kinda asshole move to just leave imho
Being interested in celebrity romances is stupid
NTA. If anyone ever said that to me I would walk away that moment. Don’t let people belittle you.
Sounds like you ATH and you have an anger problem
Aside from the stupidity of comparing your relationship to that of celebrities, Selena Gomez’s bf is actually adorable if you have more than kiddie pool taste in people. And he seems to treat her with love and respect. Thats worth more than a model face or body imo
NTA. She starting fights for nothing and if that’s he case You’d be better off single bc who wants that forever. If you can’t have a simple conversation without fighting that’s too much!
NTA at all , not even close. If she thinks she’s doing you a favor by dating you, then she’s not the one.
good for you mate i hope you find a better partner soon.
Studies show that those who are heavily invested in celebrity lives have a high correlation with low IQ.
Turns out, you dodged a bullet.
Good on you, on to the next brother
You did the right think
Your ex is still immature and shallow, equating exterior looks with worthiness. The prettiest exterior can hide the ugliest soul, and unfortunately she is showing some internal ugliness.
Bullet dodged for you, I say. NTA
FWIW Benny Blanco seems like he would clean up really well if he wanted to. He just doesn’t care about that, and Selena Gomez obviously doesn’t either. Regardless, that’s their lives and has nothing to do with you, or your ex.
I feel like you should have officially broken it off instead of just blocking her. So, ESH.
She deserves to be cheated before being dumped
I don’t get how speculating when asked a question you couldn’t possible know the answer to is “putting words in her mouth” or what she was implying by saying you’re lucky to be with her. Was she implying she’s too good looking for you? If so, that’s a pretty messed up thing to say to your partner.
The fact that this situation even escalated into this is troubling as well. Does she normally get upset this easily? In my opinion, being told “you’re lucky to be with me” isn’t in itself a deal breaker, but context matters. You know her best – if you feel you made the right decision, you probably did.
Either way, breaking up with someone doesn’t make you an asshole. Your happiness matters, too.
Doesn’t seem like you liked her much anyway.