So I’m two weeks postpartum and recently just started giving my boyfriend head again since I can’t be sexually active with him until I get cleared at 6 weeks, but last night I was giving him head and all of a sudden I noticed his phone light so I look up and he immediately shut it off so I stopped and grabbed his phone and opened it and he was watching some girl get fucked on his phone while I was giving him head. I just immediately stopped and curled up and he tried to comfort me but every touch from him just made me tense up and feel disgusting. He says it’s because he “always wants to try something new” but it made me feel like I’m not pretty or good enough for him to enjoy just me. Does anyone have advice on how I should move on from this or communicate with him about it? He knows I’m mad and upset still and I just can’t stop thinking about it now.
Comments
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We’d like to take this time to remind users that:
We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors
We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.
Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)
ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.
No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users “friend-zoned”, referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me’s, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.
All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don’t get a free pass.
Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned.
What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, “body counts” or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.
If you have any questions, please message the mods
This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Maybe point out to him that this is something you’d need to talk to a partner about before just springing it on them. That’s if he considers you a partner and not just a convenience, since it’s a little sketch for a 21 y.o. to be messing around with a teenager anyway. If you have a baby with this guy you’re probably going to have to start to gather your familial support system around you in anticipation of this relationship failing. This guy clearly doesn’t care what you think or want.
That’s something you need to clear with her ahead of time. Can’t just do it.
Gross.
I think it’s one thing if you guys have talked about this behavior being okay, but it’s beyond disrespectful for this behavior to come out of the blue. Especially during this postpartum time.
I would start off the conversation explaining to him how that behavior makes you feel like you’re not enough and go from there. His reaction to that will tell you everything you need to know when it comes to his thoughts about you.
18 with a baby, I don’t think this is a priority
He needs to go cold turkey on that stuff but don’t take it personally. It’s not about dissatisfaction with you.
You’re 18F with a baby and 21M with a porn addiction? I feel so fucking bad for this girl.
You need to tell him how this made you feel inadequate and that without your consent, things like that shouldn’t be brought into such an intimate act. Porn can be very harmful to a relationship.
A lot of the time men can lose sight that just because you’re fulfilling a need of theirs, doesn’t mean that your feelings and needs aren’t important. Especially after just having a child.
Yall are both very young and have a lot to learn, but it’s honestly disrespectful for him to even think about that without some sort of conversation before hand.
You definitely need to set some boundaries with him.
Way too young to be where you are … sorry
What a creep. That is something you ask your partner about before doing it. Otherwise, it’s gross and a real jerk move.
I agree with another commenter: get support from family/friends. Then leave him. He is not a decent person.
That is enough internet for me today. OP you need to get out of whatever situation that is.
i feel so bad for you
Get on birth control ASAP. One mistake is enough.
I have seen relationships become ruined to almost a point of no return because of this exact issue.. If you’re wanting to be in this relationship for the long haul, please see a couples therapist before the problem gets out of control. Your bf needs to be there for you during this tough period in your all’s lives and watching porn without boundaries being set will undoubtedly lead to your confidence dropping majorly
Get out of there asap. Youre still young, and there’s no point in wasting ANY more time w the man youve described. I wish you all the best and stay safe out there bb
>”always wants to try something new”
Maybe he should try changing diapers, and bathing his child, and cooking a meal, and doing laundry, because I imagine his gross ass hasn’t done any of those things either.
This is why I’m pro choice
This is disgusting. I can’t believe you had a baby with this man. After I had my babies, my husband never once asked for anything sexual. He’d just watched my body go through hell. You absolutely don’t need to be giving this guy head after giving birth, but you sure as hell don’t need to be giving a guy head who would rather watch porn.
A three year ago difference is not huge in your thirties and forties. 18 and 21 is a MASSIVE difference. If you live with him, can you move home? I’m sure he’s told you how you’re “so mature for your age” and “not like anyone else he’s dated,” but this is not the guy for you. This is not your Prince Charming. This is the toad you kissed before you met your Prince Charming. Move home. Get support there. Only communicate with this guy to co-parent.
‘Trying something new’ sexually, but not getting your consent or even just informing you, is a gross violation. And please understand that it does not matter what the guy believes is the rights of his dick, you JUST gave birth! And you have ZERO obligations to fulfil any ‘needs’ he has.
You are very, very young and are in such a vulnerable position, please take care of you and your baby first, and remember that you will never ever ever owe anyone anything that involves your own body.
Yeah. Men can be inconsiderate jerks sometimes. What are his actions after realizing that what he did was stupid and hurt your feelings? Because those actions you want to pay close attention to because it’s those moments you’re going to see his true feelings.
I don’t think it’s bad to watch porn during sex. But it does require having a conversation first. Some may feel offended and that it should be about them. Others may be ok with a partner fantasizing.
Just suck it up girl.
No fixing him. Staying ensures a crappy life for baby- and that’s who you have to prioritize now. Leave today.
Best advice is don’t take advice on relationships from reddit.
ik these arent the answers youre looking for but theyre the ones you need to listen to. This is unfixable, he is unfixable. He sees no issue. He doesnt care. Period.
Gross. I’m so sorry he’s such a loser. It’s one thing to do this together when you’re consenting but he’s done it behind your back which is effectively cheating. I’d leave my partner if he watched porn in secret. Like I said, it’s one thing to be open, but it’s the deceit for me. Probably cheats too if he watches it in secret.
Time to kick the trash to the curb.
Porn is the least of your problems.
So still waiting for the issue?
The baby is the real loser here. He never had a shot in hell.
thankfully youre not married.
if you wish to separate please look for shelters then get in contact with a social worker ASAP.
idk if ur in the US but there are rental assistance programs and WIC/foodstamps for new mothers. if youre not working they give you x amount of days to look for job and provide proof of income, or else the benefit will get cut.
im so sorry youre going through this.
whatever your plans are, I wish you the best of luck
This will never stop. He will always want something more. You can be without him. The fact that you have to give him head after just two weeks is another 🚩.
I’d be upset too, I don’t know if I could move past it personally
The only way forward is counseling with a professional. Couples counseling. You need to approach him and tell him you’re both too young for this and tell him if he wants a future with you he will need to go to counseling and be vulnerable about… a lot. Especially why he feels the need to watch porn while his wife is so generously giving him pleasure postpartum. If yall can do this and go to therapy, this could be fixed, but lemme tell you now there’s a 0% chance a 21 year old man will be able to work through this alone. It will be all lies. There’s nothing wrong with porn, but this situation is upsetting and crossed boundaries neither of you knew you needed.
Something tells me this is not the only thing he’s done that screams red flag. However, you are both young and have plenty of room for growth.
If he’s serious about changing, and truly understands why his actions have not been acceptable, then I think therapy (probably for you both), couples therapy, church, SOME kind of self improvement strategies are necessary for this relationship to become healthy.
Please leave him when you can. It’s not gonna get any better from here.
Kick his ass to the curb.
0/10 engagement bait
I hate this loser so much.
It was bad enough reading the title but then to find out you just gave birth
He’s an absolute trash can
I think the best way to move on from it is to plan an exit strategy. It’s pretty grim that he expects you to be giving head purely just to satisfy his urges unless he’s reciprocating in some way. That’s even without the porn. Like consent for other things, you should of been asked first if watching porn at the same time would be acceptable- can’t see how it would be to most.
You are not on this planet just to serve his needs, but he is treating you like you are. Well, you have more important duties than him, and that’s the way it goes when you get someone pregnant. Let him pleasure himself to porn in the bathroom.
Are you still a minor? You said just a few days ago in another sub you were 17. Are you alright? Genuinely asking, not trying to be snarky.
Leave him. This is a big violation in so many ways, I don’t even know where to begin. No consent. No respect. This is not love. And this is not a person you should be with. And if you stay with him, it will only get worse. This is the tip of the iceberg.
P0rn should always be agreed upon beforehand, NOT during
The worst ones wait until you’re committed- moved in, isolated, pregnant, married, just had a baby… those are some examples.
He casually does this now? NOT AN ACCIDENT.
Girl this is the LEAST of your worries. Like that was the goal to let a loser impregnate you?
Hey, first off, congrats on your little one—two weeks postpartum is no joke, and it’s amazing you’re even thinking about intimacy right now! Your feelings are totally valid; catching him watching porn in that moment had to feel like a gut punch, especially when you’re already vulnerable. From his side, though, it might not be about you “not being enough.” Some people use porn as a visual aid out of habit or to speed things up, not because they’re dissatisfied. His “try something new” comment was clumsy, but it’s possible he just meant variety in general, not a critique of you. That said, he should’ve been more present with you—postpartum is a time when reassurance and connection matter most.
If you’re open to it, try telling him: “I get that porn might just be a habit for you, but doing it during us time—especially now—made me feel invisible. I need to feel like your focus is on us when we’re intimate, even if it’s just head for now.” See how he responds. If he’s defensive, that’s a bigger convo. If he’s apologetic and adjusts, it’s likely just a misstep. Either way, go easy on yourself. Your body’s healing, and your emotions are extra raw right now—that’s normal too.
serious question, who was the actress?
Can we talk about the fact that at 2 weeks postpartum she’s prioritizing his needs until she is cleared at 6 weeks.
Is this something she’s doing enthusiastically or because he says he “needs” it and can’t wait???
Maybe he’s not a porn addict… maybe you aren’t enough for him sexually… MAYBE
Don’t take this too serious.. nothing has happened, he didn’t cheat or anything like that….. just relax, be curious and try to talk about it with him… you are very vulnerable at the moment. Try to explain that to him and enjoy your new family…. It’s just sex…. it should be Fun and not complicated
Not buying it
Men are pigs.
I hope this isn’t out of line and especially considering you literally have birth 2 weeks ago, he does not seem to care about your wellbeing. I would really weigh all circumstances and start thinking about getting all your things in order because you really need to think about what your next move is. I’m a stranger who only really knows part of it, but at the same time – this kind of disrespect usually gets shown pretty across the board. Best of luck!!! Remember that you are still young, you have your whole life ahead of you!! Cherish that baby, cherish yourself, and cherish your happiness above all else.
Porn is a personal/couple’s choice, so I am not going to comment on that piece. The fact that he immediately tried to hide it means he knows that it wasn’t ok. He then tried to explain/justify with a really shitty excuse. If he wants to try something new, he needs to talk to his partner (you) about that, not just do it. Guys like this will go out and cheat and say “I just always want to try something new” or some other bs excuse.
You are at an extremely vulnerable point in your life, compounded by being so young. I hope that you have the wisdom to realize this isn’t a healthy relationship, and there really isn’t anything you can do to fix it on your own. He needs to want to be better. Unfortunately, I doubt he will. When you are ready to walk away from this selfish person, know that it is the right choice and you and your child deserve so much more. You don’t owe him anything. The only people you owe your time, energy, and love to is yourself and your child. Life is so much easier without a “partner” who isn’t a real partner.
If he’s watching porn… you’re right. He wants to look at other women naked and getting fucked instead of looking at you while you’re actually giving him head. Leave him if he thinks watching porn is okay in a relationship. It will only get worse. And he even tried to excuse it. I would have cried. I feel so sorry for you.
If he isn’t comfortable to talk through why and you aren’t able to hear why, then you both need to agree that he not do that again and let it go, and maybe that means sexy times has to wait longer.
Our culture doesn’t want to hear about the impact pregnancy can have on men, because its all about her, so nobody even knows about it. It’s seems unacceptable for men to be anything but what pleases the mother, which doesn’t erase the real impact that it can have on men. It just shoves it all away and into a game of whack-a-mole, keeping any symptom of those impacts, out of sight.
honestly, i’m disgusted. he’s expecting dick sucking 2 wks post partum and he’s not even going to be fully there when you do it? dealing with a bad boyfriend is one thing, you’re in a bad way at a very young age with a baby and a bad boyfriend.
i wouldn’t have sex with him even after 6 weeks and i would be absolutely reevaluating my arrangement and reaching out to my support system. you’re a child raising a child and in a relationship with a porn addicted child. i’m sorry.
It is incredibly selfish for him to expect or even ask for any sexual favors while you are this early in your postpartum stage. Unless YOU are super horny and wanted to do this, there’s no way that I can find a reason to justify him receiving head at this time in your life.
Good men who love and respect women, do not expect sexual favors while their partner is recovering from a literal internal wound.
Another thing to note is when he was caught, he said he “wanted to try something new.” It is absolutely not okay to try something new in bed without the other persons knowledge and consent. In a healthy, safe relationship, new introductions are discussed together and involve mutual interest. He knows that. He didn’t want to try something “new” with you, he wanted to satisfy himself at your expense, regardless of how you would feel.
He is disrespectful and gross. I know youre young and a new mom so life is probably really hectic and stressful, but I really encourage you to reflect on the relationship youre in and if you want to be treated this way indefinitely. And if youre able, maybe think about arrangements to get out of the relationship once youve come to the realization that you deserve a lot more than this.
dump him
Girl you should of never gotten pregnant
hes only 21 and youre only 18. take time and try to communicate+understand each other. ignore the morons in this thread, youll be just fine.
I’ve had this happen to me too and let me tell you, the anger and disgust is out of this world. So disrespectful. Being treated like a sex toy by your own boyfriend is about the worst thing out there. If he is gonna do that, he shouldn’t involve you imo
Here’s the thing. He’s 21. There ya go. I doubt this will even last. I’m being so serious yall are so young. You’re literally a baby who had a baby. And you are. 5 years ago you were 13. A child.
You deserve better anyway.
I feel bad you’re getting so many mean responses when that’s the last thing you need right now. I’ve had two babies so I know postpartum hormones are intense. After our first I found out my husband watched porn and lied about it and I felt so disgusting for a long time because I just felt like a sexual object and I hated my body. It’s the worst feeling. Having a baby brings all your relationship problems to a head, so if you think your relationship is worth it, go to couples therapy or you both can go to therapy separately. Porn addiction is such a common issue that men have and I’ve known so many people whose relationships have fallen apart because of it.
Everyone’s situation is different, and no relationship is perfect, but if your relationship is worth fighting for and he’s a good partner and father then fight for it. If he doesn’t respect you and pressures you into doing sexual things so soon after having a baby then you do deserve better. I hope for your sake that your situation isn’t like this though but if it is then please leave him, men with porn addictions are so hard to deal with especially if they don’t want to get better.
I don’t really understand the backlash on here. It sounds like he was trying to enjoy himself more and found a way to do that that he enjoyed. If you don’t allow it in your relationship then obviously this is an issue but a lot of people enjoy watching porn as part of a healthy sexual relationship. I agree with some of the comments above to talk to him about it but some of the comments here are extreme. I think doing this is normal in a lot of relationships.
I used to encourage my ex to watch it while I did it 😓 went from 5 minutes to less than 2. ……. Just wanted to get it over with so he could leave me alone.
Tell him you are extremely disappointed in him and you never want him to do that again.
Also, stop giving him head, because he doesn’t deserve it. He doesn’t appreciate it. He can only get it if you want to do it, and after he does something really super amazing for you first. If you have to wait, he has to wait too. What a disgusting selfish sicko to do this to you.
I feel so bad for you. You are two weeks postpartum-you and the baby should be getting all the care and attention. His sexual wants/needs are irrelevant at this time. Good Lord. He is a piece of crap man and you need to do better for your baby. Get out of there asap. The longer you stay the more this type of selfishness will be normalized.
To me this was disrespectful and I’m sorry it happened to you. Your feeling are valid and please let yourself feel them. I would focus on what you can do for yourself to feel more grounded right now. After taking care of yourself as you see fit I would journal and ask yourself is this something you want in a relationship? Because the potential pattern that I see here is him doing things without caring about how it would affect you. Because let’s be honest. He knew it was wrong, otherwise he wouldn’t have put the phone down fast. This makes for a future of him doing things that he knows are wrong and will hurt you but doing them anyways and that’s just disrespectful and selfish.
Ewwww I’m so sorry you are with a person like this! Idk why someone would even do that!
absolutely nothing wrong with involving porn in your sex life like that when both partners are aware, consenting, and interested. trying to sneak watching porn during sex without your partner knowing seems extremely disrespectful tho. i admit the age gap increases my disdain for him. assuming he’s the father, y’all have been together at least 10 months now, meaning you were most likely a minor when you got pregnant, and almost certainly a minor when you started dating?? 18 & 21 is already kind of pushing it, but not inherently bad. 17 & 20 (or, god forbid, even younger) is statutory rape – legally, in many states, and ethically, regardless of the applicable law. this man is disgusting. I’d wager he’s as bad a father as he is a boyfriend. you’re better off without him, and your child may be too.
Next time stick 2 fingers up his ass that would be new to his trying 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤪🤔
Ditch this jerk. He can’t even prioritize you when you’re trying to please him? Leave him
He should he brought it up before he did it. And if you agreed to it? Fine.
The fact that the person cannot even enjoy the actual person that is in front of them is damaging
If my husband expected any sex act two weeks post partum, he’d never see me again.
girl you’re 18-you don’t need this
Everything, and I mean absolutely every single thing, that is done sexually needs to be done with consent. Even if it’s in the heat of the moment, some eye contact to make sure it’s okay or even better; fxcking asking.
You did not consent to this. He is wrong. And I am judging by him quickly trying to hide his phone; he was well aware that what he was doing is wrong.
This is where it gets tricky; forgive him and he might think he can get away with it again.
Leave him and you’re with the baby alone. Which you might be able to handle, maybe not. I don’t know how big your village or resilience is.
It’s okay to take your rest. It’s okay not to give into his needs right now. This time is about you and the baby. Both of you need to accept that. Stuff like this is just going to make everything worse for you. Breathe, girly. Settle down, recognize your body again and bond with your baby. Hopefully as an active couple, but if not; that’s okay too. You got this.
This is beyond disrespectful. I don’t even have advice. I’d have a hard time ever trusting my SO again if he pulled this sh*t,
I mean we watch porn but it’s always together. We don’t try to hide it.
This is revolting. I’m sorry you made a human being for this man.
The same thing happened to me, sans baby. In my experience, a guy who does [especially sexually] disrespectful things like that will not change. He’ll only get sneakier.
Let’s start with the reality of your circumstances: neither of you have fully-developed frontal lobes. You’re kids and now you’re raising a kid, and it’s going to be a tough road, shaking off the adolescent fantasies of what you though adulthood was going to be like and acclimating to the disappointing humdrum realities.
The only way you’re going to make it–and the odds are against you–is to be very forgiving with each other. So, YES, what he did was disrespectful and even, more than that, just dumb. He needs to know that; it’s part of his growth. But understand that the both of you are going to be making more dumb decisions in the next 5 to 6 years, and that if you want to stay together, you need to find a way to make them instructive rather than existential.
This poor baby. Broken family soon
Well what do you expect when you were underage when he knocked you up? Now he trapped you with a baby. You’re 18, have a baby and a bf who is a sexual predator and porn addict. Have some self respect and get out of the relationship. Don’t raise your innocent baby in a toxic relationship environment.
Having a baby while you’re still a baby.
Why would you do that?
I mean, clearly communication is lacking here. Whipping out our phone for ANYTHING while having sex is unhinged
The reason he can’t focus on you giving him head and fully enjoy you solely is his brain is so fried from over-consuming porn… as someone who has struggled with pornography watching porn is not trivial at all… it seriously affects your ability to enjoy your sexual partner. He may not even think it’s a problem but it is.
As a 50-year-old woman who has rarely been at a loss for words, I think this might be one of the first times I literally don’t have any advice to offer, I’m just so sad for you.
“I’m (18F) two weeks postpartum and recently just started giving my boyfriend head again since I can’t be sexually active with him until I get cleared at 6 weeks” might be one of the saddest, most heartbreaking sentences I have read on here.
The fact that you’re literally just a teenager, gave birth to a baby only 14 or so days ago, and feel responsible for sexually satisfying the young man who knocked you up at all right now is just fucking heart-rendingly sad. You are still recovering from growing and birthing a whole little human being with your own body . . . you’re just an adolescent yourself . . . you are facing the challenges and stress of parenthood way too young . . . and this guy not only expects sexual satisfaction from you, but doesn’t even love you enough (again, the young woman who literally just BORE HIS CHILD) to be completely focused on you in a moment of intimacy?
Said gently, because the last thing you need is people piling on right now, you are vastly underreacting. You don’t even seem to understand that the crux of the problem isn’t the porn, it’s that it would even occur to this young man to be looking at his phone while his penis is in your mouth, like you’re just a means to an end, instead of his beloved partner. What he’s looking at is also appalling, to be clear, but the problems started way before you got to that point. Why TF is he asking you for blow jobs right now at all? And why do you feel obligated to sexually satisfy him while he should be asking what he can do for you as you recover from childbirth?! He has a hand, if he needs release he can masturbate. He shouldn’t be demanding or expecting a damn thing from you two weeks post-partum. THAT IS NOT OKAY.
I’m not going to tell you to leave him over this. You don’t need more people making insistent demands of you. But I do think that you need to understand that this is not a healthy relationship. The way he is treating you, the expectations he has . . . these are not reasonable or okay, and they’re definitely not the behaviour of someone who loves you and respects you as a partner and the mother of his child. And I think you need to really consider that, and be prepared to consider that at 18, and based on the way he treats you, even if you share a child, this may not be the best person to build a life with in the long run.
Do you have family close by? Get away from this guy.
NTA. You just gave birth two weeks ago your body is healing, your hormones are fluctuating, and you’re likely exhausted physically and emotionally. You were literally doing something intimate and vulnerable for him despite recovering from childbirth, and he was disrespecting you in the middle of it by watching someone else. That’s not just inconsiderate it’s objectifying and selfish.
His excuse about “always wanting to try something new” is weak. If that were the case, a mature partner would talk to you about fantasies or interests in a way that includes and respects you. Not sneak porn during a moment of real intimacy.
You’re absolutely valid in feeling disgusted and not wanting him to touch you. It’s not about being insecure it’s about being betrayed. You were trying, and he was checked out and disrespectful.
If you do choose to talk to him, I’d ask:
• Why did he feel the need to watch someone else in that exact moment?
• What does “trying something new” mean to him, and why didn’t he talk to you about it?
• Does he understand the damage that did to your trust, especially during such a raw time in your life?
And honestly? If this feels like a pattern of him not respecting you, especially when you’re vulnerable, it might be worth reassessing the dynamic. You deserve to be with someone who honors you, especially when you’ve just brought life into the world.
He has a porn addiction and you are 18 with a newborn and a man who cannot go 6 weeks without having you make him cum.
As for how you move on… that is tricky. But you both need to start communicating better. All this boils down to you both are way too young. Talk to your partner. He needs to work on this.
Also… bro needs to learn to masturbate. You are not responsible for his orgasms all the time.
The fact that he was hiding the porn means he knows its a problem, but he refuses to actually address it.
But like… dude… watching porn secretly while getting head? How broken is your brain… He needs to completely stop watching porn at this point. That behavior screams of addiction.
This is all so sad
Don’t worry about it. It’s perfectly normal.
Two weeks?!? Please be fake.
Maybe the head game isn’t his thing. I enjoy it but it doesn’t get me anywhere without other stimulation like auditory or visual otherwise it just feels nice. Probably residual “trauma” from a couple mishaps. Dude shoulda said something about it though.
Personally idc when my husband watches porn while I’m giving head. It doesn’t bother me. Is this something he already knew bothered you? He said it was “new” so he may not have realized it would bother you. This is a conversation to be had. That is my response purely on your post and your question.
Here’s my other half: were you ready to be giving head or were you talked/pressures into it? Two weeks postpartum – you have a lot of hormones and changes and responsibilities. Is this normally a happy relationship? How long have you been together? What is your support system like? I feel like there is more to this story.
Get out ml it won’t get better
Sometimes a young person just makes the wrong choices in life and gets stuck with the consequences. At least you’re not married yet, so the next step will be less complicated.
Hi, i had a an ex partner like this. Emphasis on ex. He ended up being a porn addict. Except eventually even the most hardcore porn didn’t work. He needed to do the extreme things, and needed the thrill of other women.
You guys have a baby together, so I’m assuming you want to make this work. Talk to him, ask about how often he uses porn, ask him why he needs it. The responses might hurt your feelings, try your best to be calm and open minded. After your talk, you need to ask yourself if his responses were ok with you, try and figure out your own boundaries. And then try to decide if you want to fix things.
The biggest problem here is he wanted to try something new, and didn’t even bother checking in with you. That is such a red flag, and enough reason alone to leave. You have to figure it out yourself though if this is something you want to put up with