Throwaway account because I’ve never admitted this to anyone before.
Basically the title of this post. I’m 22 years old and for my whole life I’ve desperately wished that I was born a woman. I have extreme gender dysphoria, sometimes crying myself to sleep over it (yeah, I know) and if given the option, I absolutely would prefer to be born female no questions asked. Online I always tell people that i’m a woman and use very stereotypical feminine usernames. It just makes me feel better.
Before anyone asks, it’s not a sexual thing. I’m attracted to men. My dating life would be so much easier if I was a woman though, but whatever. I just needed to get this off my chest because it’s been killing me on the inside and I can’t take it anymore. I probably should speak with a professional but I just can’t bring myself to do it. I hate the idea of being trans but I wish I was a woman so badly.
Comments
Hey, thank you for sharing this. It takes a lot of courage to say something so personal, even anonymously. What you’re feeling is valid, and you’re definitely not alone in feeling this way. It makes sense that expressing yourself online the way you want gives you some relief, it’s a glimpse of being more aligned with who you are inside. Talking to a professional could really help, especially someone who understands gender identity, there’s no pressure to make big decisions, just a chance to be heard and supported. You deserve that.
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Hi sister 💕
Why do you hate the idea of being trans? There’s a lot of hate coming towards us online, but life isn’t that bad. Especially since I get to live as a woman now. That improved my will to deal with other problems by a lot, in ways you wouldn’t imagine.
My recommendation: join a few trans subs, like r/mtf or r/trans, maybe r/egg_irl, and just hang around a bit. Learn what hrt really does for trans people. Learn what’s possible.
Fortunately for you, we live in a time where you can make it possible 🙂
I understand, not firsthand, but i can empathize. It’s never too late to start your journey safely and on your own terms. You got this girl! Baby steps, baby steps! It gets easier the more confident you get!
Hey lady <3
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i hope you find yourself soon girly, ik it’s struggle but you deserve it
Lucky for you, you’re young. You’re 22, you still have enough time to learn how to pass and to voice train. It would be a long journey and you being trans immediately cuts out more than half of the men that would be interested in you but you can still do this. I believe in you, there will always be someone out there for you.
You say your dating life would be easier but it feels like you don’t understand that women also struggle with dating.. something you cannot understand is the struggles of growing up as a girl.. you view being a woman through rose coloured glasses and while there are some amazing things about being a woman it comes with pain.. you didn’t grow up being told to cover up because your developing boobs were too offensive for your father… The grass is always greener and to say being a women would make your life easier feels like an insult to actual women
hey girl, you deserve to feel comfortable! look after yourself 🩷
Hey, I started transitioning at 23 and I’m super happy, I never thought it would be possible and I felt exactly the same as you. It’s not too late 🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️
Hi sweetheart, don’t listen to hateful messages. I don’t know where you live, and I know that it is very difficult in many countries to transition.
First, know that it’s never too late for that, and than men can find you beautiful and love you. Not every men, sure, but they exist.
If you’re no sure about transitioning, you can do that step par step. You can dress up and do make up at home first. You can ask people you trust to call you by a different name and use feminine pronouns.
There is also stuff you can buy online, like padded bras, or special underwear (not sure to remember the name, something like tuck slip? Sorry). You can buy same on special website for trans people.
You can try to find locals trans group, or online ones. There is people like you.
I’m a trans man and start my transition at 20. I’m 28 now. I had gfs and bfs, friends, a good social network, and some members of my family still by my side (even if tbh there were problems before).
Do not hesitate to reach out to trans women, and you can also dm me if you have question.
Friendly reminder that:
To all the lovely people who have been kind and shown support for OP, thank you ♡
>I wish I was a woman so badly.
You already are.
It is going to take time, but eventually everyone else will see what you already know, deep inside to be true. Writing this post was one step along your journey.
Hello my love, i hear you and i see you.
It’s okay to feel like this, and i hope desperately that one day you will feel safe enough to be you! Keep your head up 🖤
Find a support group you can trust online and start seeing a therapist to get your hours in tk meet the talk therapy requirement to transition. Start stacking your cash.
There are several companies that will let you go teach English in Thailand as a native English speaker. Get a job in country and start working towards the immigration requirements.
It’ll get your foot in the door in a country that has famously made a space for trans women not just grudgingly accepted them. A place where you can be you largely without fear of violence done against you for having the audacity to live differently in a way they don’t approve of. Somewhere where you don’t have to worry half as much about your rights and access to health care stripped away from you.
I feel like this is way above Reddit’s pay grade
The fact that you have to specify it not being a sexual thing is disgusting, the only people who make transness sexual are transphobes.
being trans is scary, especially nowadays. but having watched my sister come out and transition i can tell you that the joy of living as yourself makes the scary stuff seem less bad. there is no rush. there is no pressure. but know there are people thinking of you and who can support you if you decide. there is always still time. you deserve a life of joy
Why do you hate the idea of being trans?
Congrats, you Are a woman 🙂
I promise HRT and voice training will help you feel better even if it seems like a huge mountain from where you are
Alright sis. What’s something small and safe you could do right now to feel a little better? Paint your toenails maybe? They can be hid if you aren’t ready to come out but they have cute af stickers and jewels for them now. Wanna try?
Trans guy here.
Most of us hate being trans. Not because we hate ourselves or we’re lying, but because the societal pressures and bullying and abuse we face every day. It’s ass, it’s expensive, it’s scary, it’s such a long process, and it takes a goddamn insane amount of courage. But once you’re on that road and you see the ball rolling with transitioning, it’s fucking incredible.
Because you’re at last able to look in the mirror and know your face.
Sister! We welcome you. Even if you’re only open to yourself, know that you’re included in our sisterhood.
I think you are a woman- there was just a mistake in the office in the sky and a mix up happened. Thankfully, we have been given the autonomy to fix things when they aren’t right. If you ever, ever the get the opportunity to be yourself safely, please go for it. You deserve to be yourself- we only ever get one life.