Location: Canada
coming here because you people are probably more educated on the law than me
i was at prom last year (may 2024) and it got really crowded. i ended up behind some girls and basically got danced on/ grinding motion from different people for a good portion of the night cuz it was so crowded. before i got danced on i kinda hesitated and backed up a little and thought “wait is this ok or not” but then because it was already so tight i just let it happen. i guess there was a small amount of space i coulda backed up but then i wouldnt be able to enjoy myself without turning hips in an uncomfy way and making myself uncomfortable
so i was already getting danced on/grinding motion by someone (like the persons butt was already below my waist). i wasnt really dancing rhytmically with them i was kinda just standing still and letting it happen. at one point i put my hand on the person and thrusted once or twice. it was a part of the dance, and i was just trying to go with the flow. it was also just random and impulsive and didnt give it much thought. no one said anything or reacted and everyone kept dancong as usual and stuff. i remembered this in april of this year and havent been able to stop thinking about it. another thing is i don’t really know how to flirt or talk with girls, but i got grinded on maybe 4 times that night. but i didn’t even talk to anyone…so what if it wasn’t intentional?
idk if im doing too much but was this illegal in any way shape or form? i thought i had a good understanding of boundaries but what if my actions at prom didnt show that? am i turning this into something its not? and was this illegal?
Comments
If no one has said anything about it, you’re absolutely fine. It’s good to have a head about yourself when going about these things, but also it’s a dance floor, bodies are gonna touch other bodies. As long as you are respectful, and are sure the other person is also on board, there’s nothing wrong with what happened here.
Your actions might, strictly speaking, have amounted to assault or sexual assault (there is case law suggesting that there is a common law defence of implies consent to simple assault in certain social situations, but there certainly is not for sexual assault – see R v Ewanchuk).
That said, I think it would be very difficult, on the facts described, to prove the elements of assault or sexual assault, and you might have a defence of de minimis non curat lex.
Practically speaking, given the passage of over a year since the offence, you don’t now have anything to worry about (if you were 18 at the time, you’d be entitled to elect trial by jury – and a Crown would have to be completely out of their gourd to put this case in front of a jury).