I (F20) was visiting my grandma (F72) when randomly she said her dad was her first cousin. I confirmed it with my dad and my auntie. None of have any deformities or anything like that. It’s just very….gross and I am shocked I just found this out. I’m very embarrassed.
Comments
Ewww am so sorry Ur family is like that…please don’t marry or reproduce with any of Ur cousins or family members
So the father of the grandma married his own aunt(not someone else’s wife, aunt as in relationship wise)? That’s the only way it makes sense!
The dad married his aunt, they had a daughter/grandma, which would make the dad and the grandma cousins.
That is insane and I feel like they definitely should have told you sooner because of health risks and all but if you are completely healthy then I feel like it is just a very odd thing your family that’s shouldnt affect you or anything
Op, please don’t be ashamed of yourself over a mistake someone else made what sounds like at least a hundred years ago! You are healthy, informed on the topic, and happy, that’s what matters.
You haven’t gone into specifics but, this was actually very common in the southern U.S for a long time, especially around the time your Grandmother’s father would have been around. People are smarter now, and if born today your family probably wouldn’t have done what they did either. In fact, they’d probably be as grossed out as you are right now.
Remember, you didn’t do anything wrong. So sorry you had to learn something so shocking.
How’s your banjo playing skills ?
Nothing to be ashamed of. Lots of people have this sort of thing in their past. It’s showing up more now with those Ancestry tests. Just don’t be marrying a cousin or relative, and you are all good!
It’s legal and you aren’t alone. Cousin marriage has a bad press because of certain cultures WAY overdoing it….like generation upon generation and there being a high percentage of birth defects and disabilities in their offspring. One in your family tree is nothing to be embarrassed about. Most people probably have this.
I have a married couple in my family (I think they’re my cousins but I’m not entirely sure) who met at the family reunion
It’s pretty gross by todays standards
Um, you might be surprised to find out that much of some regions of the middle east and the subcontinent still have first cousin marriages today. I wouldn’t call one instance in your family tree inbreeding per se.
yo that’s wild fr, but like… it ain’t on you, you just got handed the family lore late 😭 not your fault at all.
I just found out I was dating someone who was very distantly related to me. This was over a decade ago and I’m so glad things didn’t work out between us after finding this out. Apparently we share the shame great-great-great grandfather (possibly 4 greats not 3, not sure – I was too disturbed to inquire further).
We were from the same small town but I would never have imagined. Thank God it didn’t work out. I feel you OP.
A mistake?
I too have inbred in my family, which I didn’t know till last summer.
All though mine is my great grandmother X4 who married her first cousin (uncles son) and had like 8 kids with him.
Like I know by now the genes are fine it’s only those two who did that, and it was literally so damn long ago. But still too strange to forget about.
Right now I’m re typing up my entire family history and of course I come across it like daily. And in the back of my mind I’m like “damn that really is just existing”. I’m kind of used to it but not like USED to it.
I’ve heard the Amish have a problem with genetic diversity. I heard one story that they would get college age men to come and provide semen by having sex with a woman with a sheet that had a hole as a barrier. They never saw the women and would get beer as payment.
My aunt is married to a man whose Mom is also his sister 🤢 My cousins from them aren’t quite….. right.
Anybody have a tail in your family? Lol. I feel like older generations saw. This is very normal. It’s fine if the family knows but I wouldn’t be sharing that little secret LOL
Kinda interesting piece of family history, but it has nothing to do with you hun, you don’t have to be embarrassed, that said I probably wouldn’t be telling many people if that were my family.
Me from a country where 50% get married to cousins looking at this with bemusement.
Is a person so shamed the society that you have to feel bad for something your elders did?
Our forefathers did a lot of stuff we may not be proud of But it has no bearing on you.
My mum married her cousin but I never told anyone about it growing up. He was my step dad and they met in their 20s when we visited family in a different country. So this means they didn’t grow up together but they’re still first full cousins!
Now I’m older it doesn’t bother me anymore, I don’t go out of my way to tell anyone but I wouldn’t deny it if someone asked.
Maybe it’s not as bad for me as he wasn’t my real dad, I have two younger sisters though and he is their dad.
Things happen in families, don’t worry too much about it because it was a long time ago now.
Grandma’s Father, was HER first cousin as well. So thats… Grandma’s aunt/uncle’s son …
So…..
Wait….. Grandma’s mom fucked her nephew????? ….
Thats so gross. He would’ve potentially been a child/groomed. What. My brain hurts.
First cousin marriage is legal in the UK
Many of us have families in which that has happened, were cousins have married. When I was young that would A horrified me but it’s not me and I have no control over with somebody else does so I take a little more in stride. It is legal in some states.