I (F29) and him (M24) met 4 years ago on a dating app. I didn’t found him particularly attractive but thought he could have “potential”. We really clicked on our first date, and we started seeing each other for 3 months. I was not looking for anything serious at the time so i ended things, even tho it was hard, the chemistry was really intense, we were really getting along well etc. Plus I still had the “i don’t find him really attractive” thoughts, even with all that and after 3 months. Straightforward to today where we are getting back together. We never really drifted apart, still were very in touch, even with no contact periods in between, had other partners in our life, yet we can’t seem to let go of one another. We have deep feelings for each other and a precious place in our hearts. Almost 4 years have passed now and we both think it’s our time to finally commit and officialise a relationship. The chemistry is still insane, we match even better than we did before, he’s the sweetest and loveliest man ever, i feel safe seen and loved, we both know we will get married at some point cause we can’t see ourselves married to other people. Yet, i still find him kinda “ugly”. I’m extremely attracted to him tho weirdly enough, but he’s just not my type physically. I feel extremely bad about that, but i have a hard imagining marrying someone i don’t found handsome, as i would be too scared to fell into cheating… However i can’t help but love him, even if i tried to ignore that by being with other guys and push the “friends” narrative for years. My feelings are very real and i am done trying to erase them. But can i really look past that and rely on our bond and chemistry to ensure the relationship is going to work ? I feel so stupid cause it’s such a lame thing to think… Can i really let go of my potential husband just for being superficial and having a blocage on looks? Please help
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Dude this makes no sense whatsoever. At no point in this post do you demonstrate that you know how romantic relationships actually work.
Would you want to date someone who thought you were ugly?
He sounds like he deserves a more mature partner.
You need to work on yourself as a person
Grow up
>but can i really look past that and rely on our bond and chemistry to ensure our relationship is going to work.
Dude those are the most important bits, because one day you will both wake up older, looking northing like you do now.
Go watch shallow hal. Ffs
I think the dude deserves a little better than you though, do you honestly have so little self control you think you might cheat. You just flashing red flags everywhere.
He deserves better. He should breakup with you and get settled with someone mature.
You don’t deserve him.
And you don’t know what you’re doing with your life.
Years later and you say you find him extremely attractive yet he’s ugly?
He sounds like a great guy, and you’re already considering cheating on him. I hope he reads this and stops wasting precious time with you.
You’re both nearing your 30s. I can promise you at 35-40+ it won’t be him who regrets it.