Hi everyone! I’m gonna share my story hoping that this at least will ease my heart, and get some usefull advice as well.
Me (29M) and my girlfriend (28F) have been together for three years. As traditional roman catholics, we know our wedding is getting closer by the day. But recently, an aspect of her personality has been caughting my attention. Due to her upbringing (single child of rich parents) she doesnt know how to take care of herself to the most basic of needs. Health care, financial management, housekeeping, you name it. Everything, every decision falls in my back.
Now, lets go with the complicating factors:
1-How is she going to take care of our future children if she cant even take care of herself? We plan for her to be a stay at home mom, but I dont think that will work out anymore. Even her parents told me she’s not ready for motherhood. This question is being brought up for the past year, we talk a lot, I always try to explain to her how day to day decisions need to be made quickly and without the need to consult her parents or me, and I noticed that she can take it for a while, but as soon as a more delicate decision needs to be made (a little one still, nothing big) she panicks and locks herself up.
2-For the past four months, a friend from work (26F) has grown really close to me, and its hard not to see the difference. She knows how to handle herself, is also a really smart and dedicated woman and a traditional roman catholic as well. And now I cant “unsee” it. I look at my girlfriend and see what can be, given proper time and teaching (that we might not have due to the age and religion factors). And I look at my friend and I see what it is. Touch and go. Now my heart is split and I dont know what to do.
To anyone reading this, please take notes of the following points:
1-I appreciate your time reading this, even if you dont leave a comment. Cheers to you!
2-Please dont judge us based on our religion or tell us to go against its teachings, this is very important to us.
Thank you for reading this much! I really appreciate every comment and words of suppport and advice.
TLDR: Current GF is not ready for the next step and I feel bad for finding someone who does and being attrackted to her.