I feel unsafe (F25, M28)

Hi, F25, have been in a relationship with M28, for almost a year. At first it was great, sunshine and rainbows, as relationships are, but now I feel like I’m living my worst nightmare.

We both struggle with mental health pretty badly, but myself, I want improvements, epically as I’m getting older. Doing research, going to therapy, doing exposure therapy, but him on the other hand, is stuck in a “this is how I am” “I can’t/I won’t change” mindset. He sets it on growing up with an abusive father, not getting social skills when he was young and this and that.

But, now at 28, I feel like he should be taking charge of his NOW, not his THEN. He says he can’t change, he doesn’t know how to do basic human adult functions cause he was never taught at 8 YEARS OLD, so years and years ago, he bases his interactions on growing up, how he is now as a man, believes everyone else should fix’s their wrongs, that he doesn’t need to change, other people need to do it for him.

I feel like a house wife – doing chores, cooking him breakfast, lunch and dinner – setting out his clothes for the morning but I do ask him to do things, then they don’t get done, so then I’m nagging waiting for this stuff to be done.

I talk to him so mean, yet I’m being real is what he needs – not some woman talking to him like a baby, what he wants.

My question is: If the same stuff about chores and how he treats me constantly is being brought up, he yells at me out of anger and sometimes will get close in my business, what is the line? His mentally is, he is the way he is because of growing up, that is his mental health decrease and nothing can change that. When is enough, enough.

TLDR: F25 and M28 constantly in the mist of an argument about mental health, chores and how I don’t feel loved or cared for.