I am brown af, and every time I go to this Randal’s ( a grocery chain) at self check out, this lady asks are you buying for yourself or uber eats ? She doesn’t ask this to white folks, I have been going there for 3 years and she has been asking me from last 3 years. But she never asks this to white people.
Today I simply told her that not every brown person works for uber eats and she shouldn’t ask that, she laughed it off and moved on to helping a white guy and of course she doesn’t asks him that question.
I confronted her again, why didn’t you ask him if he is buying for uber eats??
I told her she is kind of a racist and left the place, I feel horrible because she is a nice little old lady, however every time I go there she ruins my
Mood with this question.
Btw There is nothing wrong with working for uber eats, but assuming every brown guy works for them is just weird .
Comments
damn you did the right thing honestly, sometimes even “nice” people can be lowkey racist without even realizing it.
Good on you, OP!
Is she really, though? A nice little old lady, that is. Or is that just an act to excuse her poor behavior?
She was really doing it to an extreme level where this was definitely justified.
She’s a “nice little old lady” until she’s on a jury.
Nah sometimes even the nice little old ladies need to be called out on their bs
Calling out racism is not weird or bad. What is weird or bad, is enabling it which is what you would’ve been doing if you didn’t say anything. Good job buddy and don’t let anyone gaslight you into thinking it wasn’t a big deal
I don’t even get it? Uber Eats delivers groceries so she thinks that every POC is working for them?
You should’ve told management
Why would it matter if you were? Like why is it any of her business either way? That’s such a weird thing to ask anyone.
Good on you for calling her out.
Nice little old ladies are racist, too.
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Yeah, fuck that.
I would say “wouldn’t you like to know or give it a guess” or other snarky remark and keep it moving.
I can’t remember exactly where, but a long time ago, someone said that just because someone is old,doesn’t mean they’re nice. They’re only the older version of who they are.
She’s not nice. She appears that way, but has gone out of her way to make sure she questions brown folks presence in the store. Don’t feel bad.
She’s most definitely not a “nice, little old lady.” She’s a racist POS. Kudos to calling her out on that. Next time, I’d have on headphones, and be like, “I can’t hear you. Bye.”
If she asks you this every single time you go, and you say no every time, she’s an asshole, and good for you calling her out. Don’t feel guilty, you have merely attempted to restore balance to an injustice, here. She started it by being so incredibly rude.
Ask her if she works there to support herself or for all her cats.
Good on you !!!
too many “nice little old ladies” are closeted (or open) racists who get away with that bs because they appear “harmless” or “innocent”. nah fuck that not in this day and age
This may seem petty, but by any chance do you keep your Randals receipts or there’s a reward card that’s tracks your receipts/purchase days?
I recommend you start keeping track of every single visit and interaction with her. Keep a log of visits when she asks you that, take a pic of your receipt and show the store manager your log.
With her age and racist demeanor, they may have already gotten general complaints but nobodys tracking exact interaction days. The store might need detailed examples of shitty behavior.
This is a perfect example of microaggression and good on you for calling her out!
Red flag
Even little old ladies need to be called out. Racist behavior is never ok. Good for you, she deserved it.
Nah fk those old ladies. They’ve been around long enough to LEARN not to be a piece of shit.
Good for you. Racism and xenophobia need to be called out in real time, every time. Just ensure your safety.
Nice little old ladies should be the first to be called out if they are racist. Don’t let their age be an excuse for bad behavior.
A lot of white people think it’s not racist to be racist as long as they say they weren’t doing it on purpose or didn’t realize.
Question: “Are you buying for yourself or Uber eats?”
Reply: “Do you work here or are you picking up a catering order for your Klan meeting?”
these old people need corrected
I would first ask her why is it her business if you were buying for yourself or for others? Before telling her off like you did. Like why did she care? Not like she was paying for your groceries.
Good for you for putting her in her place.
I am a pale white guy. I find presumptive people to be atrocious. I also enjoy sticking it to rude people.
Definitely report this old hag and keep up the good work.
If a person is in America and not your skin color, that does not mean being rude is acceptable.
She’s not a “nice little old lady”. Good on you for calling her out for her racism.
She is NOT nice if she repeatedly asks you the same question that you always say no to for over 2 years. She is not concerned about how it effects your feelings and it makes you feel bad. This is manipulative and inappropriate, and not neighborly behavior for a grocery store clerk to have. If it doesn’t relate to her ability to do her job she should not be asking anyone ANY questions about why they are shopping. If she keeps this up after this discussion, tell the manager and/or write an email to their corporate HQ. Post a review on Yelp/google reviews.
I’m sorry you’ve had to feel uncomfortable while shopping, that is not ok!
Hi OP, I just wanted to say that in all honesty you seem like a much kinder individual in this post than the “nice little old lady” making micro-aggressions towards you and laughing it off when confronted about it.
I work 2 jobs, one of them being a caregiver at a senior living facility and I’ve witnessed my fair share of racist and sexist incidents from residents that live there. I’ve grown to internally despise this one specific 101 year old individual in particular in the months since I first started working there, because she’s the most arrogant, insufferable, bible-preaching woman I’ve ever encountered.
She also seems “sweet” when you first meet her, and of course I still do my job and treat her with dignity and respect whenever I work with her, but I’ve learned over time that there’s reasons why her children never visit her and she never talks about them during conversations about her life, but she’ll go on and on for hours if you let her about how many “famous” people she’s “friends” with because her husband was a preacher at their church and later became CEO of a major grocery store chain in the US for many years.
Recently a black ex-governor of our state visited her while he was in town and she told him to his face a “joke” about how when she was younger, she worked in fields picking cotton and crops for a living “even though she wasn’t black” and will insist that he found it sooo funny because he laughed after she said it, when in reality his laughter was strained and uncomfortable, because typically no one wants to openly call out these “nice old ladies” for being terrible people. 🤷♀️
If she is racist she is not a “nice little old lady”…
Not saying she is, but a lot of people who protested and harassed racial integration are still around and voting.
She’s not a “nice littel old lady”. She’s a racist.
“Nice little old ladies” are rarely actually nice, and generally not kind. There’s a reason she only asks that of poc.
Excellent
“I am just getting food for my grandma so she doesn’t have to work at the grocery store because her kids never took care of her”
Fk that lady. I work in Self-checkout and there was a couple that would appear every day and always buy a lot of food and I’ll be honest, it took me until a few months in when I finally helped them check out the stuff that I realized they were doing delivery app orders and I just thought they were donating food to charity or that they had a very large family and were in charge of buying the food.
NEVER once did it cross my mind to ask “are you here for a delivery” because it’s not my fking business first of all, and secondly, it didn’t matter to me regardless if they are there for themselves or others because my job was to help people at self-checkout and not to question what they are doing there.
Good for you!
This story seems exaggerated. My guess she probably asks a lot of people this question. Probably anyone who looks broke or out of place. She probably doesn’t recognize you from visit to visit. Congratulations on your showdown with a little old lady and plans to get her fired through corporate. You’re a hero.
I just want to know why the fuck it matters. You’re there to get groceries in exchange for money. Why does it matter if you’re buying for yourself or someone else? I bet you she’s not really a nice little old lady. She hides behind that exterior bc she knows she can get away with fucked up shit. Good for you for saying something/emailing corporate. Next time she asks you, just ignore her. It shouldn’t matter anyway. I’m sorry she’s treating you like that.
Maybe she’s just trying to make conversation and trying to find common ground.
Good for you. People feel comfortable in doing veiled racism because they assume everyone will be polite enough to not challenge them on it. It’s time to make people take a look at themselves and make them hesitate before they do it again.
No, she’s not a “nice old lady”.
I’m a nice old lady. She’s a racist.
Good I hope she stops and thinks before she opens her mouth next time!
She’s not nice if she’s racist. Good for you for standing up!
So… I’ve got to know, DO you work for Uber Eats?
I think that the worst problem is that she thinks that it’s ok to speak to you that way bcs she was ‘raised that way.’ I’m glad that you called her out! I’m whiter than paper, but that doesn’t make me better than others. I’m just human! For a long time now I’ve been telling ppl as long as we’re all bleeding red I’m going to assume that we are human- but if you show me someone that bleeds green we might have something to talk about.