I am 4’7″/140cm tall. I found out through a friend in the early 00’s that means I am technically a “Little Person”. I have no medical conditions related to my stature, I am literally, just short. My feet stopped growing at the same time too. Not to be TMI and trying to be discrete I began to enter adolescence in 3rd grade and I stopped growing. For whatever that is worth, there are no perks. Just a lot of assumptions from strangers and nearly identical awkward conversations with everyone from airline seatmates to the guy behind the counter at the local corner store
It’s a weird in-between space. I am not tall enough to blend in, but not “short enough” to be recognized by advocacy groups as included. Large crowds scare me because in a sea of normies as people are jostling their eyes always follow a flat view of the location, so where I am standing is I only perceived peripherally, and their brains process that emptiness as a “space’ in the crowd. I get crushed consistently, and even in this day and age, “accidentally” groped. Which was worse when I was younger
My weight fluctuates for unrelated reasons. So there are times I am nearly as round as I am tall. Shopping for clothes is a scavenger hunt with the exception of plus size Capri yoga pants, I buy everything with the knowledge I will have to have to tailor it if I want to wear it to a business meeting or at the very least roll and pin it. I keep a tin of safety pins in all my vehicles, my purses, and my desk. I have built a wardrobe that can fit the 3 different sizes of “me”, so most of my quality wardrobe pieces have to be safely timeless.
I wear a size 3US/1UK wide shoe. My roller skates from the 70’s still fit. You can not find professional dress shoes, much less fun heels off the racks in these sizes. except for a few extremely niche retailers. Nordstrom at least carries down to 4 and 4 1/2 on some occasions and it is not uncommon for me to buy a 5 and make do if the shoe is not nice enough to bring to a cobler I use to have them customized.
All of the expected stereotypes apply: Reaching anything above the second shelf requires acrobatics or asking a stranger for assistance, who almost always comments. If you are behind me on the road you would think my car is driverless. It would not matter if I had tentacles coming out of my ears, everyone calls me “cute” because of my height.
After writing this maybe hate isn’t the right word. And like many who feel “different,” I’ve learned to live with it, I am thankful for what I have got.
I am not looking for any words of encouragement, etc… Just sometimes it is nice to be able to vent.
Thank you.
Comments
Thank you for allowing us the opportunity to listen.
It’s ironic how everyone wants to be seen as unique, for those of us who are it can be an isolating and challenging experience to live in a world built for the “normal”.
I love your body type and follow you on a couple platforms.
As someone who is 4’10 I understand. Thanks for letting me listen.
Thank you for sharing. In the exact same boat, and I know no one like me. No one gets it. It’s hell.
When I’m out with my partner, people constantly make assumptions that I’m his daughter. He laughs it off to try and make me feel better and they get really embarrassed once I correct them because it’s very obvious once I speak I’m not a child. I can tell it bothers my partner still, and I wonder if sometimes everyone would be better off if I’m single for the rest of my life. People make such quick assumptions off a glance and height.
Sometimes, just existing feels embarrassing. Telling TSA, I don’t need a guardian to travel with. Bar tenders gawking and calling Co workers over when they realize my ID is real. Not being able to find clothes i like that fit. If I don’t full cake my face, which I don’t often do cause of sensory issues, I’m treated like a child.
I cannot express how good it feels to see someone else who gets it.