As of writing this it is 10P.M., meaning I’ll be a legal adult in 2 hours. I’ve been on a waiting list for the psych ward for weeks, and they decided that the day before the most important birthday of my life was opportune to admit me.
I fucking hate this. What were they thinking? Nothing, apparently. I talked to one of the doctors who decided on the date and as it turned out they didn’t even consider the possibility that I would at the very least want to wake up at home for this. Any day after today would have been better, but no. They just had to fucking take this from me. ANY other birthday, I could have lived with. but this? Fuck no. There’s no making up for this. No, I don’t want to celebrate some other day because some other day is not my fucking birthday.
I don’t think I want to celebrate anymore, or any future birthdays tbh. All my important birthdays have been ruined. 13? COVID-19. 16? Sick. Now this. Honestly, all my birthdays have been shit. I don’t want to do them anymore.
Comments
I’m so sorry this is happening right before your birthday. It really sucks when something so important is taken away from you, especially when it feels like it’s just been one disappointment after another. It’s completely understandable to not want to celebrate anymore after everything you’ve been through.
I kno it might feel like birthdays are ruined now, but you still deserve to have your own time to do somethin special when you’re ready. Take it one day at a time, and if you ever feel up for it, you can decide what you want to do for yourself. Right now, just focus on taking care of you.
I know you’re upset, and I’m sorry! You definitely have a right to be upset, but you could also try to put a spin on it when you’re ready.
Give yourself time to be upset, but when you’re ready, think about how when you turned 18, when you became a legal adult, you started a brand new chapter for yourself.
All your birthdays are important, but maybe look at this one as the birthday that really kicked your life in a new (positive) direction!
Happy birthday, OP! It’ll get better ♥️
A different perspective… my kids father is military. He’s away for various reasons. We NEVER let a birthday slide because it fell on a day when we couldn’t do everything we should for it. Make your birthday exactly what you want, when you can. It can be your celebration for when you reach a milestone maybe, or see it as an opportunity to plan what you really want to do,
Sorry to hear, but happy birthday!
Honestly, had multiple psych ward stays growing up. Some were scary, some were massive unintended pleasure and enjoyment!
Life is what you make it- favorite psych ward stay was a week in Fall of 2012. Spare a long backstory, I tried a serious suicide attempt and failed.
Once cleared from ICU, spent a week in a local ward. 1 night shift guard was a neighbor I got high with regularly, so he brought me my clothes and blankets from home. Morning coordinator was my old boss, got special treatment from her. A night nurse was another neighbor who smuggled candies to me after lights out. 1 of my friends also happened to be there & showed me how to fiend med nurses into giving you nearly any narcotic meds ya want, so was high whole time.
Hospital admissions, even the psych ward, are based on a lot of factors. The admitting team doesn’t have the luxury of being picky. When a bed opens up they have to fill it. Insurance authorization might be a factor too.
I’m so sorry it’s on your birthday, but tomorrow is the first day of your adulthood and a new chapter in your life.
Right now it sucks, but hopefully someday you’ll see it was worth it.
Happy 18th Birthday 🎂
Think of it this way: you are entering adulthood in the most adult way possible, by taking care of yourself long term at the expense of temporary enjoyment. That’s a big deal! I, an internet stranger, am so proud of you! If you don’t want to celebrate 18 when you get out, that’s ok! Instead celebrate that you have taken a great step to help yourself. Most 18 year olds are not this mature and it’s OK to be bummed about the timing. You’re doing awesome, happy birthday!
You’ve been waiting for weeks, needing the care but, not knowing when you’d be able to receive it. Maybe, think of this as a “gift” that could have been given to someone else. You’re so fortunate to have received it in your time of need.
Happy Cake Day! 🎊🥳
That is understandably frustrating and upsetting and I’m sorry that is the current circumstances, especially with Covid/sickness overshadowing previous birthdays. However, as it is what it is, and marinading in it will only hurt yourself, I offer a different perspective…
You are about to enter adulthood. In a different set of circumstances you could be entering it in exactly the same situation you enter every other day, in the circumstance and headspace that has lead you to the point of needing this level of support (which there is no shame in, I’m proud of you for accepting this help and really do wish you the best for your journey ahead). Or… you can enter adulthood in a space that can offer you change, growth, and support. You begin this new chapter of life choosing to invest in yourself and a better future. It is an important milestone that is typically celebrated in an important way, and although it is not the way you wished for or hoped, it is important none the less, and depending on how you view it it can be as meaningful as you make it.
So let yourself feel what you need to feel right now, safely give your sadness and grief the moment it deserves, and then rationally decide how you want to process this in the way that is most beneficial to you. Best of luck OP, I am rooting for you!