It took me a long time to really start seeing through her crap. There have been so many little things here and there that paint such a different picture when looked at together. She always acted so innocent, that even the really crappy stuff got swept under the rug and it was always our responsibility to take all blame, praise her supposed intentions, do what we could to make everything ok so she wouldn’t feel bad, etc… It’s just what’s expected in their family, I guess, and no one else is quite getting how unhealthy it is. But then again, no one else has quite the role my husband and I do, so maybe no one else has quite hit the point where they couldn’t pretend anymore?
DH’s siblings don’t hide their rude behavior as much, so I think it was easy for her to sit back and act like she was a saint. But… she’s not. I still don’t know what all goes into her behavior and how much is actually good intentioned, nor will I ever, because that’s between her and God, but good heavens, she is really not that nice if you’re actually paying attention. It’s truly mind boggling to me as a mother how she can be such a jerk, especially to her own son. I can understand to a point from studying these things, but it’s still mind boggling and heartbreaking.
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