The last two years of my life have been a living hell because my JNMIL lives with us. She is a widow and it was a non-negotiable for my husband when we got married. I said it was fine, thinking it would be. I was naive. As soon as we got married and I moved in EVERYTHING changed. We come from different cultures and she immediately started hitting me with these passive racists comments, then getting pissed off when I didn’t greet her guests that I didn’t invite, and saying I had so much stuff (when I probably brought 5 boxes of stuff). Long story short, she’s tried everything in her power to control me, manipulate me, and ostracize me to no avail. It hasn’t been easy but I’ve just ignored her for the most part.
Recently though, I’ve seen her starting to really crack. I’ve told my husband she obviously doesn’t like me, but he disagrees. Well, lately her behavior has been undeniably aggressive. We had a family dinner with extended family and she made the main dish, I decided to make a side dish of veggies and everyone devoured it. My SIL was cleaning up the plates and my JNMIL practically yelled at her asking if she had tried HER dish, seeing she’d mostly eaten mine. I couldn’t help but laugh and my SIL side eyed me with a little smile.
Then last night my MIL cooked for dinner. She made some meatballs in a gravy sauce and also made some meatballs plain in a separate pan. I took the meatballs that were plain. My husband gave me a look and said “take the gravy” and I told him I didn’t want any. He got a look on his face that clearly said ‘my mom will be offended’ but I wasn’t about to eat something just to make her happy? So I come to the dinner table and she IMMEDIATELY asks why I didn’t get the gravy. 😂 I tell her I didn’t want any. She huffs. Then I’m telling a story, mostly to my husband, and she just interrupts me with the most irrelevant comment about how some guy walked by the house looking drunk. I stop talking and kinda tilt my head at my husband like “see? She interrupts me.” This is something I’ve told him several times. She will just talk over me at any given time, in any conversation, with anyone around. My husband’s shoulders shrank and I just looked at her and it clicked. She so obviously hates me and is jealous of me. And you know what? It feels so good to see it so clear as day now instead of walking around pretending that she doesn’t everyday. I couldn’t help but smile at her childishness. I don’t know if I’ve reached insanity or the high road, all I know is that I’ve gotten under JNMIL’s skin simply for being myself and it feels pretty good.
Finally yesterday she snuck up to her room when she heard me coming down to the kitchen. The days where I avoided her are over. Now SHE is avoiding ME. And I did it by just ignoring her. Success 💛
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That’s a good win! Congrats! May your future battles end that well.
You watched her mask slip and pointed it out to your husband. He is trying to preserve his mom’s feelings in a way that controls you and you refuse to take part in the childish game. He needs to check reality and I hope he understands her behavior is the problem, not your refusal to enable her.
awesome – lock up your things and install cameras. She’s up to something.
SUCCESS!!! let her be intimidated by you.
Also, I think it’s sooo weird SIL can support you a little against MIL but your own husband can’t. I think he’s definitely gaslighting you! If you interrupted your MIL, he would defiantly notice because it would offend her. It’s clear because he notices something as small as you not trying her gravy.
You have an SO problem. But congratulations on being unbullyable to this woman.
Good for you!!! Well done!! 👏
The best revenge is a life well-lived. You’re living it.
Dude, this is wild. You straight-up living in a sitcom episode. Legit sounds like JNMIL is acting jelly cuz you’re not bending to her whims. Mad respect for you keepin’ it real, stickin’ to your guns. Stay strong, sis!And P.S. – highkey think you’ve reached the high road. Better view up there anyways! Keep slayin’!