I know this probably doesn’t belong here, and maybe it’s not the right kind of post, but this is really the only place I feel like I can let it out. I broke up with my ex of 7 years because he refused to propose last year. After everything we built, after all the conversations and years of waiting, I finally realized I couldn’t keep putting my life on hold for someone who just wasn’t going to choose me in the way I needed.
And lately, I keep thinking about something that probably seems small, but it’s been weighing on me. Every single year, I’d ask for a pair of Ugg slippers for my birthday or Christmas. Not subtly either. He’d ask me what I wanted, and I’d tell him. Always the same thing. He knew.
They didn’t need to be new or fancy. Even second hand would’ve made me feel loved. But they never came. Instead, there were always expensive gifts,games, gadgets, things I never asked for. Things that felt more like what he wanted to give, not what I actually hoped for.
It was never about the slippers. It was about feeling seen. Feeling like the little things I said mattered. Like he heard me, and remembered, and cared. And I guess I just never really felt that, not in the way I needed.
Now I keep almost buying them for myself, and I can’t believe how hard it is. I stop every time, because I know having them will come with this strange, bittersweet sadness. Like I’m finally giving myself something I quietly wished for all those years, but it’s too late now, and it didn’t come from the person I wanted it to.
It’s not about the money. It never was. It’s about being known. And I just needed to get that out somewhere
Comments
This is sad and sweet. Thank you for sharing. I need to listen to my significant other and show her she is loved.
Get the slippers for yourself and consider it a true closure. Show yourself that the person who should care for you does and that is you. Sometimes we forget to care for ourselves the way we should and put our self worth in others hands. Buy the slippers and see that as a first step towards your new future.
Time to love yourself the way you want to be loved. Buy the damn slippers.
You deserve the slippers.
Ugg slippers are comfy as hell and I think you deserve to have nice slippers 🙂
You need to show yourself true love to yourself again in another way besides putting yourself first by leaving him, by getting yourself those slippers and closing this chapter in your life
You are a queen.
you’re not crying over slippers
you’re grieving being unseen for seven years straight
you asked
you were clear
you kept hoping
and every time he chose something else, he wasn’t just missing the gift—he was missing you
those slippers became the symbol of all the ways he didn’t show up
not because he couldn’t
but because he didn’t listen
and now you’re standing in the wreckage with nothing but a memory of wanting something so simple, so human—and getting ignored for it
again and again
buy the damn slippers
not for closure
not for spite
but to reclaim all the little pieces of yourself you kept on hold for someone who never deserved the privilege
this time, they come from someone who finally gets it—you
Girl go buy those slippers.
My ex would buy me a bunch of costume jewelry every year, he’d spend a couple hundred bucks on junk that would quite literally sometimes break same day. I asked for a nice necklace that was $100 one time. I never got it.
You can make yourself feel cared for more than anyone else can. Mind you I haven’t bought myself the necklace I wanted and maybe I never will but at least I won’t go through the disappointment constantly. Think about it that way, bite the bullet and buy them to make yourself happy and you can tell yourself how happy and comfortable they are when you wear them everytime. Make it a positive memory instead