I (22M) have lived in a small two-bedroom apartment with an older woman (37F). We got along just fine and would watch movies sometimes. She told me she has been married twice and in her last marriage her husband had full custody of her kids (I didn’t ask why because I didn’t want to be rude or bring up any bad memories). But a few days ago, me and she were watching a show, and she brought some alcohol and offered me to have some, which I declined because alcoholism runs in my family. But over the course of the night she kept asking, and I caved in and said yes, getting way too drunk. By the end of the night, the room was spinning so badly I tried to go to bed, but she followed me to my room, and we ended up having sex. She said she was sorry the next morning and she was just lonely. She still tries to have sex and if I turn her down she starts to cry, telling me I’m all she has. I feel so bad sometimes that I just have sex with her. I want to move out so badly but have nowhere else to go.
Comments
Keep nailing that cougar.
I’m really sorry you’re going through this. What you’re describing sounds like a serious case of manipulation and coercion, and it’s not your fault. You were taken advantage of, especially when you were intoxicated, and it’s not okay that she continues to pressure you like this.
You don’t owe her anything—especially not your body or your peace of mind. It’s completely valid to want to leave, and I hope you’re able to find a way out soon, even if it means looking into emergency housing or reaching out to support services in your area.
You deserve to feel safe and respected in your own home. Please take care of yourself.
Damn might be time to look into government housing.
LOL
If the gender roles were reversed, and/or if it was your child, how would you feel about the situation? What advice would you give them?
Let her cry. She can get a battery operated boyfriend named Bob,for short, and get over it.
W
I don’t see the problem here. You’re an adult.
You don’t owe her anything, she’s taking advantage of your empathy what she’s doing is basically SA’ing you because you sound like you don’t want to have sex with her, please start looking into moving out or kick her out
This is rape.
Is she hot?
Memories of renting room from older mom.
Some nights if broke, I agreed to babysit. Bad date, a little tipsy, and she used me happily.
It was my first time out of my parents’ house and very memorable!
Enjoy the little joys in life, grasshopper!
Boundaries need set. Get to it. It’s going to get worse
do you have her Instagram ? if for a friend looking for a roommate
Let me get it son
Fucking hell…. what a manipulative woman. All the best to you, may you find your own place, soon. Home needs to be peace of mind and this is none.
Astaghfirullah
You are being drained and while that’s hot, it’s losing personal power. The only one who can save yourself is you. If you need a hero, be one.
Dear Penthouse….
This reminds me of the movie I watched ‘THE READER’
Be careful. 2 marriages and lost custody of her kids? MAJOR RED FLAGS. Sounds very manipulative of her, she could black mail you
with claiming S.A to get her way with you and more.
Make sure you record her advances so she doesn’t falsely accuse you and get away with it. Make sure it’s legal to record.
Broooooooo. You gotta move out my guy. This is scary manipulative behavior. My ex was like this and I wish someone had told me what I’m telling you now, her mental health is not your problem to solve.
That’s manipulation, you should find a way to stop it
This isn’t healthy. I know loneliness and neglect can cause awful behaviors in desperation, but forcing depressants in alcoholism, and inhibition lowering alcoholism/Drugs on other people, and making them vulnerable through empathy is one of the basic red flags of sexual abuse/assault, along with gift bombing, and narcissism that corners an individual into lowered self confidence and anything that usurps healthy boundary setting in human interaction. Sex should only be initiated by the person one finds themselves attracted to, if it’s a reciprocal and true connection.
Tell this woman what I just told you, and let her know that taking advantage of an intoxicated person for sexual gratification, is sexual assault. Because a human being that has been deprived of her natural inhibitions and boundaries is now at risk to victimization which is what she just did to you.
It’s ok to feel hurt but a better man, would calmly tell her that if she needs a friend to take to her about her depression and loneliness then you are willing to be a friend, but not at the cost of your moral obligations to yourself to decide what is right for your own self pride. I’d tell her she needs to quit drinking and stop the manifestation of manipulative narcissistic behavior in planning her seduction of you out of her own loneliness.
But be the bigger person and forgive her sexual assault of you. 👈. 😒
MOVE OUT. Try to stay with a friend. She’s a MONSTER.
I mean…. Is she ugly? If not… dude, you’ve got a friend with benefits that’ll probably let you try anything with!
This doesn’t add up. If the room was spinning that badly, that’s past the point of a drunken fumble. I mean it’s questionable surely if an erection was there if he was that drunk. If so, with the room spinning. If it was true then OP was taken advantage of, but it’s questionable.
If you can move at all you need to move! Let her cry Sis, she is not your responsibility to take care of! And she is manipulating you so bad! I’m so sorry you’re in that situation!
The comments here are disgraceful
Dear Penthouse, I never thought I would be writing one of these letters, but…
Introduce me.
Tell her it‘s haram so you can‘t continue
This is absolutely rape. I’m so sorry you are going through this. Start trying to get your escape plan in order and looking for other places to rent. Also, if you can get any evidence (either record your discussions or get her to admit to something in a text message) then your case will be much stronger if/when you go to the police. You may also want to consult with a lawyer – not sure how all that works but you have rights to feel safe in your legal place of residence. You may be able to get a protection order that let’s you stay there and forces her to leave until you have a new place lined up. Stay strong and take care of yourself.
Wow some of the comments here are disgusting. If the roles were reversed and the man was doing this to the woman everyone would be calling for his head on a stake. It should be the same thing with this woman.
hey so that’s rape
I need me that kind of roommate
Before you move out… message her about what happened the first night, claiming that it was her who wanted this and made you drunk and coerced you. In case she tries to blackmail you with false rape accusation.
Send me your address I’ll live with her 🤣
If this is real, and I assume it is, I REALLY hope you’ve had your boys snipped. Don’t procreate here, please.
You’re going to have to decide whether no is no…
Sexual coercion is not okay, making someone feel guilt for not letting them use your body to please themselves is abuse. It does not matter what gender the offender is, you do not deserve to be treated this way. She know you have nowhere else to go and is using that to her advantage. Do you have a friend you could stay with until you can get into a more stable situation? I hope you can find an avenue to get out my friend.
I don’t care about your genders. You are describing SA. You are being manipulated and SA’ed by a predator. You need to leave or report her to the police and have her removed.
Be very very careful. With people like that you don’t know what they will do. She could accuse YOU of assaulting her, damage your property, etc. Though you have nowhere else to go right now, I would start planning and saving to move out ASAP.
U got didddyied my friend.
So many red flags here! 🚩
Don’t let her use that manipulation tactic on you. She’s sexually abusing you!!! 🚩🚩🚩
This is sexual assault and not normal at all. and I can’t believe the top comments don’t understand that. Please move out immediately bc she’s a monster
She’s manipulating you into having sex with her :/// That’s really weird, and the age gap is placed well enough for her to know she’s being weird. You’re only 2 years older than me, and she’s almost 40. I’m so sorry this is happening to you OP!! I hope you have some people close to you that you can talk to <3
you’re so young omgg
People are gonna hate me for this, but throw her a bone and enjoy your time spent. Maybe avoid a regular relationship but most guys I know couldn’t get laid with a guy to their heads and you might be overthinking things. I may also be wrong and a total asshole so don’t listen to me but if you think about it a little differently, you could be the one taking advantage lol
(X)
people gotta quit with the weird projection/fetish posts.
I mean is the sex good (this is a joke) get yourself out of the situation somehow, let her cry, and tell her you can’t be just screwing someone without actually being with them, you have self respect, this is when you use it
Bro you are a victim, best thing to do is get the fuck out of there before she decides you are the bad guy and ruins your life to protect her own
Bruh. Manipulate her. Your turn go on. Full send lol. U take advantage..more..you are taking advantage too already. But how about not paying rent 😉 if you enjoy. Go on. 37 is not old btw.
Um, what the hell did she do to lose custody of her kids? Must have been pretty bad since that only happens under extreme circumstances.
is she hot?
damn some people are really god’s favourite
She raped you.
You were too intoxicated to consent. She took advantage of that.
Now she’s emotionally manipulative. She’s a classic sexual predator.
at this point, you can say to others “dont call yourself a people pleasure if you’d never found yourself having sex with someone just because you feel sorry for them” without irony…
like my bro you’re literally beyond the people pleasure thing
Sweetheart, she isn’t taking advantage of you, she raped you. She got you drunk to the point that you were spinning and trying to go to bed. She supplied you with alcohol then pressed you to drink after you refused it. Then she got you drunk until you were not in control and had sex with you. She absolutely knew it was wrong because she apologized the next day.
Moreover, what she is now doing is coercive. As a woman about her age with a child your age, she absolutely knows the vulnerability of someone in your position. Knowing you are young and have nowhere else to go, she continues to pressure you into a sexual relationship, manipulating you to have sex with her with her tears and excuses.
Let me be clear, there is no amount of lonely I could be that would make me pressure someone half my age in a desperate situation into servicing me sexually. If she was lonely, she already had your company and companionship. She did not need your body. She was gross and wrong to a criminal level, for getting you drunk and having sex with you when you were not of sound mind to consent. I hope you see this and do everything in your power to get away from this person and to safety. This woman deserves jail time for her actions.
You deserved better. You deserved help and empathy.
If it feels wrong then it is. You could always say no my dude. Never be swayed by tears, bet she’s been doing that all her life. They know it works.
If you do leave, tell her after you have done so.
I dont see the problem here ..tell her this doesn’t mean we are in a relationship and keep d*ckin her downjust dont get her pregnant.