I (M27) Declined GF(F24) for sex and I feel guilty ?

r/

Uhh don’t really know what to make of this. My girl lives about 3 hours away so we only see each other once or twice a week. I picked her up and had her over last weekend. We were spending the night smoking tree/drinking while playing a board game while a movie played in the background. We yk… started kissing and making out before she started touching me up and down motioning for sex. I declined and said I’m sorry love. I was just very tipsy, very high, and very tired and i felt like I wouldn’t be able to maintain an erection while in all these avatar states and I didn’t want my baby to feel self conscious and think that I became soft because of her yk? So why not stop it before it starts was my logic. Well unfortunately my girl who’s on her period walked to the bathroom and started crying. I feel bad like I shoulda said yes but I’m like damn if the roles were reversed type shit yk? Like … what if a man began pouring and crying because a woman said no… idk. I don’t really know what to say, she’s been in the bathroom crying and she said she’s going to sleep on the couch tonight… idk what to do

Comments

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  2. Ulibo_98 Avatar

    Send her this post.

  3. Brilliant-Object-467 Avatar

    Sounds immature to me..

  4. Reasonable-Ant5913 Avatar

    I want to be logical but also not rough. If I was in your position I would talk to her about it. I wouldn’t go long without speaking to her especially knowing your 3 hours away from each other I’ll speak face to face to show you care and not being “nonchalant” I could understand maybe she was in the mood and now she has to wait for you a couple days or maybe she felt like you aren’t taking her seriously or don’t find her attractive. I would reassure her and let her know the real truth on why you didn’t have sex with her.

  5. curvyci Avatar

    this is lowkey thoughtful as hell. agreed, send this post to her

  6. BytesSWE Avatar

    You’re 100% right about everything you said. If the roles were reversed you’d be getting cooked lol I understand not doing it because you can’t give 100% or not wanting her to be upset over it. Because she already got upset over you not wanting to do it… she’s clearly young and probably immature to be crying over denied sex. Like it’s not that serious and your reasons were valid. “No” is even a valid reason lol

  7. Rafe_vff33 Avatar

    Sounds like she has rejection/self esteem issues but I also think you should go ravish her. Sex is t always perfect. Go make the best of it.

  8. mrr2121 Avatar

    i mean i don’t think she was crying to coerce u or make u feel bad. was it cause she was also tipsy and high and on her period. maybe she felt rejected and insecure in the moment. but u 100% should not feel bad for saying no to sex ever. you’re allowed to not be in the mood and hopefully she knows that

  9. Buckybarns37 Avatar

    Girl here,
    I don’t think it’s about the fact you said no,
    If she’s on her period, she’s obviously not feeling well she also probably has alot going and wanted a release, or she just thinks that because you said no you aren’t attracted to her, don’t push yourself to do it because she’s upset but maybe ask her to go on a walk or to a 711 maybe and get snacks together

  10. kairokat Avatar

    nah dude!! if you didn’t feel comfortable, it’s 150% okay to say no. i think a chat when you’re both sober would be the best way to go, especially if this is something that’s really bothering you. no offense, but it sounds as though your girlfriend has some personal problems she needs to work through. none of this is your fault. i hope everything goes well for you in the future ♡

  11. DecisionAvoidant Avatar

    It’s tough to know what she’s feeling, but it’s probably a mix of rejection and disappointment. I’ll bet she was looking forward to spending some physical time together, but she may also be worried that you’re not attracted to her because you didn’t jump at the chance to get in bed with her. She might not understand that you avoiding sex was in an effort to be respectful.

  12. Scorpiogal88 Avatar

    Did you articulate the reason like you have here ? Or you just said No and never said why .
    Then periods make us emotional monsters then add smoking yo