I shit myself.

r/

I was sitting on my chair, about to get ready to shower, I felt a fart coming on and i thought it was a fart but i pooped myself . i pooed on ym favorite sweater which was on my chair . i had yogurt last night and im lactose intolerant , I hate my life. i feel gross.

Comments

  1. LastAtmptAlmostWorkd Avatar

    Well clean it up and throw out that chair… were you bare assed in it?

  2. Icy-Doctor23 Avatar

    It happens.
    Clean it up and move on

  3. distractionsgalore Avatar

    I ate some bad food. I was driving my car, and I also shit in my pants.

  4. BasicallyTooLazy Avatar

    I laughed so hard at this; I’m lactose intolerant too and dairy feels like shrapnel going through my intestines. Ugh

  5. DarDarBinks89 Avatar

    Don’t feel bad. When I first found out I was diabetic, the meds were a nightmare for my GI tract. I shit myself a couple of times. Thankfully in the comfort of my own home. Shit happens, literally sometimes.

  6. Dear_Investment6064 Avatar

    The number of times I’ve gotten a panicked “I shit my pants” text as the friend that never judges I just gotta tell you I’m pretty sure this is a canon adult experience that finds us all eventually and we just never speak of it (except if you’re me I guess).

  7. Will_okay Avatar

    This is what off my chest should be

  8. Gotheran Avatar

    *ahem* Shit happens. *drops mic*

    seriously though it can happen, some time after getting my galbladder removed i too had a bad accident, really ruined my mood, my pants underwear and chair, but the moment will pass.

  9. dizzyzabbs Avatar

    Chill out! It’s happened to EVERYONE!! There isn’t a person in this planet who hasn’t shit their pants! If it hasn’t happened, it will.What have we learned? Don’t eat stuff with lactose. But also, don’t trust a fart after you do!

  10. iidontwannaa Avatar

    Just be thankful you were at home. I’ve shit myself at work before.

    Shit happens. Life goes on.

  11. ArTwoR2 Avatar

    It happens. We’ve all been there, whether we admit it or not

  12. imemine8 Avatar

    Have you tried goat milk yogurt? I can’t have regular yogurt, but I eat a lot of the goat milk ones!

  13. fruitypebbles_1989 Avatar

    If it makes you feel better, my friend had a video call interview and shit herself during the interview and had to sit in the chair until it was over. So.

  14. ArTwoR2 Avatar

    It happens. We’ve all been there, whether we admit it or not

  15. DixieDragon777 Avatar

    I was having lunch with 2 friends. One suddenly told us we needed to go, NOW..

    She had terrible diarrhea all over the chair and floor of the diner, out the door, across the sidewalk. I grabbed a cheap Walmart throw and covered the seat, they got in, and I drove with the windows down in January all the way to her home, gagging the whole way.

    Awful-est rotten, putrid smell EVER. I tossed the throw and had to air my car out.

    Turns out, she had bleeding in her bowel, and a lot of what she passed was old, old blood clots. She wound up in the hospital for transfusions, then surgery.

    Sometimes, we just can’t control it.

  16. fermentedyoghurt Avatar

    Naw fam, it happens to all of us sooner or later. I’ve shat myself at my big, ol’ age. Sometimes our body betrays us. Shit happens, literally. Clean it up, take your shower, and all will be good 🙂

  17. GoddessfromCyprus Avatar

    It happened to me in a shop. I was wearing pants so it didn’t drip onto the floor. I was in 2 minds whether to wear a dress in the morning.

    I ran put trying to find public toilets, and tried to clean myself up.

    Luckily I had a towel in the car, so that go the brunt of any stains.

  18. soobuuun814 Avatar

    Could be worse. Instead of your own it could’ve been someone else’s.

  19. Elmacanite Avatar

    I shit myself minutes before a job interview. You’re gonna be ok😅

  20. TwinkleBliiss Avatar

    It happens, dude. Clean up, laugh it off later, and maybe skip the yogurt next time. You’re still good.

  21. Own_Firefighter_3900 Avatar

    That’s enough internet for today

  22. CrEperz Avatar

    At least you weren’t in your bed.. thought it was a fart. Ended up being a Shart!

  23. sabo81 Avatar

    Quit bragging! Lol

  24. Jumpy_Test4527 Avatar

    You can’t get this stuff out of me

  25. TripleThickBacon Avatar

    I don’t care if this is real or not. It’s hilarious.