I steal from work and I honestly don’t even feel bad or have any regrets about it

I work in a pretty big company that handles betting. I work minimum wage, and only just manage to scrape up full time hours. I get no allowance for time off aside from one allowed sick day every 4 months. Even when I was physically locked in my home it got put down as an unauthorised absence, as was one time when I was hospitalised from an acute asthma attack. The betting agency can’t change what they pay our customers out due to the stealing because payouts are fixed based on game/race prices for our company, nor can they drop our pay as you legally cannot be paid below minimum wage here.

They also cannot lower my hours without discussing it with me and changing my contract, which id never agree to our sign off on, as I signed a legally binding contract. Could they fire me if I was caught out? Yeah, but would I miss the job? Definitely not, I’m actually already looking for other jobs and them firing me would only make that process easier as I’m only being rejected for many of the jobs I’ve really really badly wanted due to my notice period for quitting and them needing immediate starters. There was even a pub job that I applied to 5 times and even told everytime that I was mid quitting process, but no luck.

So this brings me back to my initial point. I’m stealing from work. Have been since I started here.. The variance in cash after bets have been paid out due to most of our customers refusing to take change and giving it all back is negligible, I end up 3 pound up at the end of the day? I declare 5 pound less and take a fiver. I end up 7 pound up? Same goes but I take 10.

I end every month struggling for AT LEAST the last 4 days sometimes even for the last 2 weeks until paid. My rent is almost 40% of my pay, and bills also making up 30% I pay for transport and often even have to go hungry in work through any shift where I work less than 7 hours because I can’t justify getting lunch due to finances. I’m still adjusting to living alone and work less hours than all of my colleagues. the business will still live on just fine just missing 2 or 3 pound every now and then. As my manager said when I was in training. I’m not the only person who finishes the days a couple of quid down or up, in a job like this its honestly to be expected. Besides, I only steal when necessary and I have absolutely nothing and I haven’t received tips that day. It’s maybe every 3 weeks or so, if that.

I used to feel horrid about it, riddled with guilt. But honestly, now I kinda feel like they deserve it. My area manager is a horrid horrid person and the company owner is ten times worse. Our area manager told me that even if I was locked in my home I should still come in. Wether I could lock the door after finding a way to leave or not was not her problem, if I got robbed, then that would be my issue.