A few days ago I was over at my close friend’s house, and we were talking shit, cracking jokes, and just messing around. At some point, I casually joked about how, when I was a kid, my sister used to make me give her head whenever we played “house”—I was the “daddy” and she was usually the “mommy.”
As soon as I said it, the entire vibe changed. My friend gave me this weird look but still kinda laughed, though it felt forced. I felt awkward, so I apologized asked what was wrong. She basically told me the joke wasn’t funny and then went on to say she thinks I may have been SA’d by my sister.
Now, this was never something I had ever considered. I never saw myself as a “victim.” I wasn’t traumatized, I didn’t have nightmares, nothing like that. I’ve always seen myself as a relatively normal girl—maybe with some issues here and there, but nothing major that affected my daily life.
I never even thought of labeling it as SA. We were both kids with me being 7-8 and she being 16. She didn’t know any better and I don’t even think she remembers it happened since it was so long ago. My friend suggested I talk to her about it but it’s just so awkward to talk about especially if my assumption is right and she doesn’t remember it even happening.
I don’t really know how to process this information nor what to do with it. It’s so weird and it’s been the only thing on my mind EVERY single day ever since me and my friend last talked.
Any advice or perspectives would be much appreciated.
Comments
idk 16 is an age where u can kind of understand right from wrong….. she more then likely remembers her 16 year old self
She remembers …
Uh that’s multiple crimes. Sexual assault of a child, coercion, (possibly depending on local laws) child endangerment, and incest. I’m not going to tell you what you should think about it because it’s your experience, but a 16 year old who knows right from wrong doing that to their 7-8 year old sibling is extremely fucked up. I’m sorry you had to go through that
My step sisters used to make us (me my sisters and cousins) play house and boyfriend/girlfriend. They would make the younger kids touch each other and have me and my cousin my age go down on them. It’s so disgusting to think about now, but most of us were SAed by adults when we were kids..so this felt normalized at the time. I so wish I would have said something. One of my cousins were actually caught playing this with their step sibling and was sent to juvy over it. I wish I would have said something then.
I think it’s too late to say something now.
16 is almost an adult, she knew what she was doing. I’m so sorry, this is a lot to take in, I had a similar realization years after the fact, it sucks
I’m sorry to say, but that’s definitely SA. At age 16, she DID know better. CSA is definitely a thing.
AI Trollbait is bad.
She was 16…. She knew what she was doing. It wasn’t SA, it was straight up rape.