What the title says, I’m think I’m getting tired of acting and dressing like a boy.
I’m not being forced into it by anyone And yeah I like the style of how I dress, with the loose fit jeans, baggy clothes n stuff like that. I like having muscle cuz I could lift heavy things or whatever that means. I have a humor that’s like dark and obnoxious like how most boys have when they hang out with their friends and they scream around and get into trouble or whatever. I like being like this.
I always wished I was a boy. Life would be easier and every time I remembered I wasn’t, well I’d get really upset. I’m not trans tho, I never was. I am gay and that’s also a reason why I wished I was a boy lol.
But recently I felt like I wanted to become more feminine. Instead of wearing these baggy clothes I saw girls wearing tight clothes and thought “hey, that actually seems pretty nice” like I wanted to dress like that. I seen girls in groups doing makeups and doing their hair together and also thought that would actually be pretty fun. I actually want to do these things. I want to wear makeup, dress like a girl and have a boyfriend and I find those things to be real fun.
The problem is my body, specifically my face.
I’m not REALLY UGLY, I think I look okay, but I just don’t look like any girly girl. My face is like a circle shape a bit square not really idk and I have like a serious look to my eyes. Like I don’t know how to explain but I just don’t look feminine. My face won’t look good with long hair and it won’t look good with make up or anything like that.
It actually really crushes me that I can’t be like a normal girl by dressing up in feminine clothes wearing makeup looking beautiful because of my face and voice too. I feel like im starting to not really want to be a tomboy but I just want to be like other girls and do my nails or whatever, but I can’t because of how I physically look. I feel a bit forced to dress like a tomboy. Don’t get me wrong I like it it’s comfortable I like how it looks but I just don’t really want to do that stuff anymore.
Felt the need to type this all out because I can’t tell anyone and I just need to get this off my chest in any way now. Thanks for reading
Comments
Totally get where you’re coming from. You’re not alone in feeling stuck between what feels familiar and what you’re starting to really want. It’s okay to change. You don’t have to fit a mold to try new things, makeup, tighter clothes, doing your hair, those aren’t off-limits just because you don’t think you have a “girly” face. Tons of people feel that way and still find their own version of femininity. You can explore without throwing away who you’ve been. You’re allowed to evolve.
You can do and be anything you like, you never have to be just one thing. You can be a tomboy who occasionally wears dresses, you can be a muscly girly girl, you can wear makeup and sweatpants – you don’t have to pigeon hole yourself to make it easier for others to understand. People are complex, how you present yourself can be too.
Makeup is magic, do not give up on yourself before giving it a chance- not that you need it but I just recently started my makeup journey and I’m 28 so I get it.
Also, you can be whoever you want whenever you want. Maybe just ease into it if you’re nervous? Take a close friend with you to the mall and try on new clothes! See if you can get a makeup tutorial at a makeup store! See if you want that connection with someone or if you really want these things! You can be feminine in your own way. You don’t need to look like every other girl to have that.
You got this 💜 Please explore! Life is supposed to be lived! Don’t limit yourself before you truly try.
Many things to consider.
The first being your age I guess, your features will change the more you grow up.
Then, regarding aesthetics, you don’t have to look like a “girly girl” (which definition will drastically vary depending on where you’re from). There are so many styles that can correspond to what you desire, the most important thing above all being that you like what you wear and feel confident wearing it.
I personally needed to wait to work and have a salary before finding my own style, I wasn’t the most handsome in highschool but now everybody I met complimented me about my style and confidence.
Hairstyles are also very important regarding the way you see yourself and how people perceive you. Skincare is another, that will go a long way with years passing.
I won’t comment on make up as a dude this isn’t my field if expertise but it might also help.
Overall I believe it is essential to understand that finding “your way” is about trial and error as well as doing extensive surveys about the trends you might like.