Okay, this is going to sound insane… I live in the UK, me and my ex broke up recently, it was amicable with us arranging to spend time together as friends going forward. When I left, my cat stayed until I could find a more permanent place to stay. Within a week I was told that he had to be taken to the vet because he was dehydrated. He made a full recovery after getting fluids from the vet. This took place on the Monday.
On the Thursday I sent a text to say that I have arranged for him to stay with me and I would drop by later that day to pick him up. The response to this was ‘no’. Now following that I just thought I’d ignore it and just go there in a couple of days to pick him up. That evening I am told that he has died, obviously at this point I want to know what happened and where he was. Eventually I am told that he’d been taken to Vets4Pets emergency, the timescale that I had was 8:30pm-10pm as it took this long to get a proper response. So, naturally I google the vet and find their phone number, I give them a call to which they inform me that they have no record of him coming into the vet. Along with this I am also informed by them that I have phoned Vets Now and not Vets4Pets but they still checked regardless (this will come into play later) though I then phoned Vets4Pets and they also had no record of him.
Within this same time frame I am told by her (my ex) that he (the cat) had been cremated. The next day I am told that she will be receiving the ashes on Sunday.
Now bear with me because some context is important here… my ex has a history of alcohol abuse and this was the case whilst we were together. At the times when she was drinking she would tell me things that were obviously lies but they always said included some sort of sob story that would essentially give her more of a reason to drink, along with this I had seen her on multiple occasions answer phone calls when the phone hadn’t rang but she would then be told some bad news each time. So it’s safe to say that I’m not completely convinced by all of this.
Sunday comes and I am sent a picture of said ashes which are inside of a little baggie and a small box with paw prints on. As I am suspicious of this I checked Amazon and low behold both of these items were the cheapest ones of this kind that could be purchased from their website. The next day I collect the “ashes” but she was adamant that I had to wait outside of the building in order to collect them. Upon receiving said “ashes” I opened the box which had a small screw on the bottom in order to inspect them. To my amazement the “ashes” looked like flour along with broken/crushed pieces of glass. Upon closer inspection it appeared that the contents had been crushed inside the bag and created holes within the bag itself.
After getting others to inspect and agreeing with my conclusion (one of which swears that the taste is the same as self raising flour) myself and my team (friends/co-workers) conducted a small investigation by phoning different vets to enquire about prices and services of pet cremation, none of which support what I have been given. Along with this I have been informed by the police that it is not a legal matter but a civil matter as I left the cat in the property when I left there, however as mentioned I had the intention of collecting him at a later date.
So, I decided to confront her about the “ashes” during a phone call to which she told me that he is dead. Though she could not explain why the “ashes” were in the box/bag that I was given. She could not provide any proof of the cremation and when I confronted her about Vets4Pets not having a record of him she quickly changed her story and said that he went to Vets Now. Which I replied that funnily enough I had phoned them too and they also had no record. Her response? They are lying to me.
I have since been blocked on everything and have no way in which to contact her and I do not know what the best course of action is from here. If anyone has some advice I would greatly appreciate it. I just want my cat back with me where he belongs, he has been with me through 3 kids being born and 3 relationships across an almost 11 year time span.
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Sounds like a civil matter.
If she is going no contact, and the ownership of the cat is in dispute you would need to address this in small claims court I suspect. The sooner the better.
I would just throw out the rest of the noise and focus on that.
I’d be calling the police TBH. I don’t know of anymore creative ways to see if she still has the cat, but that is what I would do.
This is so messed up. You’re right to trust your gut, really hope you get your cat back.
I can’t get over the fact you said someone TASTED it 😳😲
You’re not crazy, You’re not overreacting, You had a long, loving relationship with your cat and your instinct to protect him, even after this, says everything about your character.
If the UK is like the US and considered animals property, go through your proper court systems. Take all vet bills and paperwork. Chop registrations if the cat is chipped. And messages about your cat just staying there until you could get a place. The texts about this mess. Call the vets again and see if they will cut a quick letter of the cat not being seen by them on their letter head. File in court.
Just FYI in case anyone finds the GF’s story plausible… When our pets have been cremated, we don’t get them back for approximately two weeks. The box our large dog came home in was very very small…a cat would be in a tiiiiny little urn or box The ashes do come in a plastic bag inside the box, but the boxes I’ve seen have all been fastened shut with some kind of specialized screw that’s really hard to remove.