I thought the Little Caesar’s Pizza dude was Greek. How do I move on from this?

r/

For many years as a child I always thought the Little Caesar’s Pizza dude was Greek. I also thought togas were Greek. Anytime I picture ancient Greeks… it’s togas and tall white columns and that game Gex 3 Deep Cover Gecko I played as a kid with the level in ancient Greece. But I noticed college fraterinities would have Greek symbols and have toga parties so there’s that.

I apologize to all pizza makers,anybody of greek heritage,anybody who studies greek culture,and to Little Caesar’s. I also apologize to the Greek Gods Zeus,Poseidon,Hera,Demeter,Ares,Athena,Apollo,Artemis,Hephaestus,Aphrodite,Hermes,Dionysus,Hades,Hypnos,Nike,Oceanus,Nemesis,and Iris.

Lastly I apologize to the Greek Philosophers Aristotle,Democritus,Heraclitus,Diogenes,Epicurus,Parmenides, …and all the rest of them. May their wisdom shine down upon me and realize that I made a mistake.

Comments

  1. LornaFromTheFeed Avatar

    the fact that you included Hypnos and Oceanus in your apology list means you’re already spiritually redeemed, carry on noble scholar of pizza-based enlightenment

  2. Full_Mission7183 Avatar

    I am stuck here in New England surrounded by Greek pizza. You don’t owe them much of an apology based upon the torture the rest of us experience.

  3. Rare-Satisfaction484 Avatar

    I’m sorry.. you will never recover from this.   I’m afraid all your  pizza-derived happiness in life is over now.   Everytime you eat a slice of pizza it will taste like cardboard

    But there is one possible redemption…

    You need to found your own pizza chain called “Little Leonidas” it’s your only hope.  The slogan can be “Greek Pizza, Greek Pizza”.

  4. Sneaker_Pump Avatar

    So he’s not Greek? What is he!? Roman?

  5. Middle-Painter-4032 Avatar

    That’s ok. I thought the ‘Noid was Welsh.

  6. ryogam73 Avatar

    A Caesar is the title given a Roman Emperor.

  7. Hollowbody57 Avatar

    Ah yes, Little Caesar’s. Named after the famous Greek general and dictator.