i told my best friend i was busy so i could spend the day alone

r/

sometimes i just need a break from people, from talking, from pretending i have the energy to hang out. my best friend invited me out yesterday and i told her i had plans. in reality, my “plans” were laying in bed, ordering food, and watching a movie alone with my phone on do not disturb.

i love her, but i’ve realized that just because someone wants your time doesn’t mean you owe it. i used to feel bad about saying no, but now? not really. i’m learning to choose myself sometimes, even if that looks selfish to others.

just needed to get that off my chest

Comments

  1. CaptainGisseno Avatar

    I’ve been doing this for years lol, it’s totally valid to want to be alone. Don’t beat yourself up for it

  2. PandaDawn Avatar

    I do that so often my god don’t ever feel bad for taking time for yourself! After all you can’t be a good company when you aren’t feeling well, or better you wouldn’t be as present in the moment with her. But by taking care of your own needs, recharge, you will be much more present at your next encounter:)

  3. depressedsinnerxiii Avatar

    People need time to recharge, or whatever actually. You don’t need to apologize for it.

  4. nippyhedren Avatar

    This is not selfish. And you didn’t need to lie. You should practice saying “that sounds great but I really need some quiet time. I’m going to stay home today”.

  5. Silent_Syd241 Avatar

    Self care, Me time it’s all the same. You know yourself well enough to know when you need a break from the outside world. Nothing wrong with that it’s important to recharge, recalibrate. The body needs rest and stillness sometimes.

  6. kah43 Avatar

    Nothing wrong with doing this at all. Just know that after a while they will just stop taking the time to try and hang out with you and find people who actually do want to do things so you can’t come on here in a few years complaining about how none of your old friends want to see me anymore.

  7. m_cardoso Avatar

    I usually do this too lol I need my comfortable time alone, having no worries, just chilling by myself. One of my best friends is more outgoing. Years ago he used to complain about us not going out too often, nowadays he seems to understand (or accept) that I’m more of a house person. Actually asking me out less makes me look forward more to when we go out together.

  8. Blood-Upbeat Avatar

    I’m glad my best friend is exactly same so I can just say honestly I’m not up for socialising with anyone and she just leaves me be and vice versa.

  9. Regular_Dig5404 Avatar

    Sometimes when people ask me to do something with them I say I have plans without telling them those plans are me sitting on the couch with my cats on my lap. Plans are plans, no matter what plans they are.

  10. Moiu-1405 Avatar

    Just talk with your friend if she is the best one for you she will understand that you need “me time”.
    It is not hard, all ppl have this. When i tell my friends i will not “peopling” today” they are ok with this and ask me if i have groceries for the weekend (as they know i will not go out at all).
    Other is like we will make plans to meet and them both of us will pray for other to cancel, yes we both know about it, and laugh about it.

    Be open about “me time” as it is important for mental health to have some.

  11. AdministrativeStep98 Avatar

    I do that too, I call it “scheduled rest”. It’s important to have moments where you just relax and don’t do much, that helps with maintaining the moments where you are productive

  12. StitchedSilver Avatar

    See this is just a Tuesday for an introvert, I couldn’t hang out with my best friend once a week let alone multiple times without burning out

  13. No-Strawberry-5804 Avatar

    You were busy! Busy being alone

  14. the-soul-moves-first Avatar

    Sounds like you actually had plans. I make plans to spend time by myself when I need to recharge or decompress