I know I look a certain type of way. I’m close to 6ft,big guy, tattoos, short hair and would look out of place at an EDL march. Thick old fashioned London accent doesn’t help.
But a little about my past. We were football lads. Our weekends were about football drinking and women. It was a big shock when One of our pals came out as trans. But we had known them since we were knee high and didn’t care. This was 14 years ago and it just wasn’t as accepted. We got to know Sarah she came to the football still but got a fucking load of stick for it. Her dad hated her for not being this son he’d dreamed of having. It got real fucking dark and Sarah sadly took her own life. 12 years later I’m not over it. We lost a good soul that day. I’ve always tried to be an ally since.
Fast forward to yesterday, I’m in a public space, a trans lady comes and stands next to me. A little too close for my liking but wasn’t the issue. Terrible hygiene was. I’m talking discoloured skin, rotting teeth, dirt under their nails and a mix of b/o and halitosis. So I moved away. She ugh’d at me and said “bigot”. My demeanour changed and my partner spotted it instantly and said do not react. But I did. I proceeded to highlight said hygiene problems and said that I moved because she fucking stinks. She broke down. I suddenly realised I’d gone too far, my partner later told me I went too far. I don’t know what bigotry they have faced that may justify that being her response especially from people that look like me. I’m so disappointed with myself as I could’ve just said oh no I was making space. But nope had to go to harsh defence then attack. Even if we cross paths no apology would make up for it. I’m literally just a dickhead.