You know that kid that does their homework at one of the tables and takes orders at the register? That was me. My father did the cooking, my mother did the frying, my sister and I handled the FOH and packing orders with school work. When I got older (12+) I started making the egg rolls, peeling the shrimp, wrapping the dumplings/wontons, etc.
I was that Asian kid raised in a family restaurant AMA
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How was your social life then? And how is it now?
How did you feel about your childhood? Are you/did you inherit the restaurant?
How old are you and what do you do now?
Ever considered sueing your parents for unpaid wages and child labor?
Your childhood was basically a business management degree.
What’s your relationship with your parents now that you left the business? Also, do you still cook?
Was the food at least good?
Lol you are like any other FJ kid. Let me guess did your parents ship you out when you were born and then 4 years later bring you back?
Would it make a difference if you were male?
How do they get the food to taste so much better than can be made at home?
I’m guessing you guys had a Chinese restaurant.
I’m sorry. There’s a Thai place nearby that I go to once or twice a month, and their two small kids are always sitting there in the corner on iPads. I’m sad for them.
I basically had the same childhood, except my parents made me work in the restaurant and go to college so I wouldn’t have to inherit the restaurant. Worked weekends and holidays until I was 26, then worked holidays until I was early 30s, when I moved states for work.
I felt like not hanging out with friends on weekends hurt my growth in developing relationships, because I didn’t have time to date in college. I didn’t have my first gf until I started working.
Do you feel working in the restaurant hurt your social growth, like do you feel behind in your ability to have deep relationships especially with the opposite sex?
Did you guys have a secret menu?
Piano or violin?
I am sorry for your past but without whitewashing what happened is there any positives you can take from it like bussiness acumen or people skills?
How did you come up with your handle/name?
how tf did you have so much homework? were you doing other people’s homework?
What’s the ethical thoughts – if any – on visiting these restaurants? Reading your comments makes me not want to support somebody who does this to their kids, but also, don’t want the sacrifices the kids make to be in vain
How did your immigrant parents know how to start a business? Paperwork, legalities, etc?
I can feel this. Substitute German for Chinese and that was my childhood. I went to college and joined the military to escape my parents’ restaurant. Still impacts me not in the most positive way nearly 40 years later. Ended up caring for my father financially after my mother died… Until he got remarried and didn’t tell me for six months after the wedding. Went no contact after that; even after 40 years he continues using me for his financial gain with lots of emotional damage. Thanks dad.
What’s the Asian restaurant version of spitting in the refried beans?
I grew up going to the same Chinese restaurant for like 14 years and I always saw a boy and a girl doing homework on the first table, Never realized this was so prominent.
So are you a good cook now? Can you impress your friends with your cooking?
There’s a Chinese restaurant that my partner and I get take out from, and there’s a young boy there that we always feel so bad for bc he sounds so miserable and he is ALWAYS there, never is he not. I try to slip him a tip but I think he just gives it to his parents. What can we do to let him know we see him?
Just wanted to say hello as a fellow kid that worked at a family restaurant too. 👋 Glad you’re out of that situation. Wishing you the best!
I’ve seen this exact AMA word for word before
I get many people have had this experience, but I don’t think they need to use plagiarism to tell their story
My FJ wife experiences is just like you. She didn’t make a lot of friends in High School but she was able to make a lot of friends in College. She became very business oriented from working at the restaurant. We now owned two businesses but none of it is a restaurant.
Why did you choose to study/pursue nursing?
What’s your go-to soup recipe?
Is there something we can do as customers when we encounter the kids who were in your position?
It’s hard to believe your parents only made 44k running a Chinese restaurant?.. can you elaborate more on this
What is the secret to wonton soup broth?
Are you in touch with your parents? Do they realize what they did to you?
Are you doctor yet?
What’s your future plan? I have a friend who grew up the same and went to college and is now a developer (IT, not real estate). My understanding is the parents generally don’t want their children to inherit and run the restaurant. At least the Asian families.
I was this kid too. I played sports in HS and one big thing that got me was parents never showing up for any event except for graduation. My dad did try to accommodate by bringing food for the team a couple of times. That was a really nice gesture.
Appreciate OPs perspective. I was in a similar setup where my parents owned a supermarket and I started working at 10 years old. Besides school, I was working with my dad. Long hours but he paid me. But, the opposite effect happened. Don’t get me wrong, I hated the work and our store was located in the middle of the hood. But, I will say, it helped me more than the negatives. How to read people, business acumen, work ethics and priorities. Been in tech industry now for 20 plus years with numerous promotions. A lot of it is credited to hard work, applying business acumen to my work and reading people like I read my customers at the store. This stuff wasn’t taught in school. Everyone’s situation is different, I understand where OP is coming from and everyone’s outcome depending on the circumstances are different. Trust me, I hated my work and once I graduated from college, I knew I had to land a job quick or I would end up working at my parents shop. That motivated the heck out of me. But looking back, my time working for my dad help developed and prepared for the real world.
Any chance that was in Wheaton, Illinois? We had a restaurant exactly like that.
Pick up any food cooking tips or hacks?
Hi! My husband and I own a restaurant and are TTC. Any advice for things you wish your parents had done different, or advice for how you wish they balanced the restaurant and you kids? Appreciate any advice you can offer 🙂
Sorry you had to deal with that. When I was growing up, I used to visit one of those restaurants and remember the young kids working the front end. It was interesting watching them grow up alongside myself. Just know that I respect the hard work, and don’t feel ashamed. Hard working people are tough to come by these days
I was the same. I helped out in the restaurant.
The one thing my parents did was refuse to teach how to cook so that I dont have a backup plan to work forever in the restaurant.
Peeling shrimp and wrapping spring rolls, good times. Mostly though I was stuck washing dishes.
What are inside hacks or tips of ordering Chinese food? Anything to avoid? Or something people are missing out on?
I was in the same boat but was a nail salon kid. :/
How do you always get the orders correct? Do you bring shame to your family if you mess up an order? How do you pack those bags so efficiently?
Do you feel like it contributed positively to your character as an adult, giving you a good work ethic and a general understanding of business and hard work? I want to raise my kids in a toned down version of this environment because I don’t want to sound like a boomer but this new generation is still unemployed playing Fortnite at 30 years old and I feel like that didn’t exist 50 years ago.
My husband grew up as a dry cleaner kid and he hates laundry. Do you hate cooking?
I have a question that you may or may not know the answer to. There are several Chinese buffet restaurants that we go to all the time. Some of the same workers have been at all of them for years. But they still know very little English, and they’re not familiar with things that we talk about in the area, like the local amusement park. If they lived in this area for years, how could they not know about Kings Island; they had to have seen commercials and advertisements. Do they not do anything in their free time? Every year at Christmas I give them each a card and I’ll print what I wanna say using Google translator (hoping I got it right) and give them each $50. They’re all so nice, and the best, hardest workers we’ve ever seen, and they take such good care of us. They all have phones, so it’s not like they’re cut off from the world. Thank you.
I dated the Italian version of you. She was a hard worker. Knew the ins and outs of the business. Didn’t take prisoners.
I grew up on a dairy farm. I left the house at 5am to start chores and in the evening by the time we cleaned up the barn an washed the equipment we got back in the house at 9pm. That was 7 days a week. When people ask me about it I tell them, Well you know poverty is a terrible thing to waste.
I love those restaurants. Family run restaurants always seem to stay open as long as there’s customers. I’ve come in 10 min before closing for takeout and they enthusiastically say they’ll accept my order.
What’s your favorite recipe to make and to eat? Something easy 🙂
Do you believe there should be laws that prevent a child of the business owner from working at ages below 14?
Did your folks make you dishes off the menu and did anyone ask if they could get a plate to go?
I’m the same as you! Luckily I had an older sister that did most of the customer orders though. I only did it occasionally. Also we had a piano on the back and we (3 sisters) were forced to practice everyday so all the customers could hear us playing lol!
Did you enjoy eating the restaurant food? We had a steam table so I would use a toothpick to sneak a piece of spicy chicken or black pepper chicken when there were no customers or parents around
I thought I was tripping when I saw this AMA and swear I saw a similar one a month or so ago. Turns out this is a similar AMA.
Restaurant kid life can be rough. Somewhat fortunate in my case it was only part time since my parents split up. Can’t really look at Chinese American food the same anymore.
Was the menu just Chinese food or was it expanded a bit with things like Thai, sushi, etc?
I want to thank you and your family for your service to society. I definitely wish your family could be more successful though.
I have a good feeling about your future and wish you the best.
On a side note… I always try to order off the traditional asian menu when I find one. What are some of your favorite traditional dishes?
How do you make/what’s in the sauce that comes with dumplings? Like the dipping sauce. Can I buy it already made? What’s it called? I love putting it on my fried rice after I eat my dumplings.
If you were 18, and went no contact with your parents, how do you live? How do you manage your finances? And how do you make money
What do you hope to be when you’re not at the restaurant anymore? Do you have any plans for studying towards those goals?
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