I’ve kept this to myself for a very long time now, but I honestly want my parents to divorce. This is my first time posting on reddit and I think this is a good place to get this off my chest because this has been boiling inside of me for months. My english isn’t very good so I’m sorry if the grammar is a little weird.
My mom is the smartest, strongest person I know, and she deserves so much more than the man she married. She works very hard everyday, she’s a professor and teaches civil engineering in a good college. She has worked so much to get to where she is now.
My ‘dad’ is completely dependent on her. He doesn’t work, all he cares about is money, and he gives her a hard time for everything. I’ve only seen them fight twice from what I remember, but both times ended with my mom crying on the floor. He never supports her, emotionally or financially.
He never finished school, and throughout my entire life I think he had only had one job, he doesn’t even try to get one. I’ve always brought up that dad should lock in, get a job, and help his wife (they never took me seriously). All he does is drink, sleep, doomscroll on facebook, hang out with random friends (who recently ditched him drunk in the middle of nowhere from what I’ve overheard), vape like a teenager, and barely do anything around the house. He thinks cooking once or doing the dishes earns him the right to be treated like a king. He provides absolutely nothing. I wouldn’t even call him a father.
I’m in school for 10 hours. When I come home, absolutely tired, there’s still dishes piled in the sink and the trash is still there since the morning. ‘Dad’ is at home the entire time. I catch him either sleeping or doomscrolling on facebook while laying in bed. Then the first thing he does when I just got home is complain to me about the trash still being there and the dishes still aren’t taken care of.
When mom comes home from work, the first thing he does is go through her wallet and it pisses me off everytime. When he has money (probably stole from mom or wherever he got it from), he only spends it for himself, his vape, going out to drink, I don’t know. He doesn’t use the money he has to feed his family at least. He looked annoyed at me one time when I asked him for money because I wouldn’t be able to buy lunch at school. Also, one time he stole the money that mom gave me so I could pay for my tuition. When I confronted him about that, he got angry.
Sometimes he would come home drunk, got in a fight, almost got himself in jail, or all of the above. Then mom would be the one to fix the mess he made while he sleeps and relaxes like a baby. Involving our clueless, innocent family to whatever he got himself into. I don’t even know why and how she’s still with him after every idiotic, immature thing he does, but I really wish for her to just get a divorce.
If they did get a divorce, nothing would even change in the household except for it being finally peaceful, less mouth for my mom to feed, and no more parasite.
My mom could be thriving on her own if she didn’t have to carry him. But I don’t say anything to her because I feel like it’s not my place to bring up divorce. And if I ever said anything and my dad finds out, I’m scared he’d get violent. I hate watching her struggle while he drags her down. I hate that I have to call him “dad” when he doesn’t act like one. I just want him out of our lives.
I’m only 19, about to graduate senior high school, lives with mom, and no job. I’m thinking that only if I have a good source of income, where I can live on my own, that’s where I can suggest mom to get a divorce because I could help her get away.