I dint know how to link my last post, sorry! If you look on my history you’ll find it.
Tldr: my partner was extremely unsupportive when I had a migraine. I unfairly attributed this to his gender.
I want to start by apologising to the men who apparently are supportive. I’m yet to meet one of you, but the stories I have read from women make me at least hope for your existence.
Many of you will be happy to know we’re done. He went away for a few days and I thought that might reset things. For three days it did. We were happy, communicating, and loving.
Today is my birthday. We went out with a friend couple. We all got drunk and ended up round theirs. The guy was touching my hand. I didn’t want to go in the first place, as I felt a weird vibe, but my stbx was insistent. I kept allerting him that this guy was touching me weirdly by touching him and getting him to look – I didn’t feel i could move as his gf was passed out on my lap. I was super uncomfortable. Instead he went to the loo. He came back and saw this guy was still touching je like he had been for the last half hour right in front of him, and got mad at me. He pushed me twice. He left for his friend’s house.
Maybe it’s pathetic, but I listened outside the window for a while. I needed to hear the way he talked about me. It made me sick. You guys were right and I needed to hear it.
I’m getting the locks changed first thing in the morning. He was supposed to take me on a trip this weekend but I no longer care. He also left me high and dry for a work thing tomorrow – I’ll figure it out. I’m better off alone.
I am the breadwinner and this flat belongs to me. He refused to contribute to housing costs so never signed any sort of lease. Sucks to be him.
Comments
Good job, I’m proud of you!
I am so sorry you had to deal with this but so glad you’re getting out. Reminder to stay safe. Maybe pack up his things and leave them with a mural friend so you don’t have to let him back in. If you do ever permit him entry, make sure you’re not alone.
Addendum: adding my voice to the evidence that wonderful, respectful, emotionally intelligent and available men do exist. I truly hope you can encounter them not just as potential future partners, but also as friends.
Good on you!
Once he is out, do not let him back in. I saw you said you were changing the locks which is also good.
If he has access to any passwords, change them. Probably should change them anyway to be safe.
If you have a third space (like parents home) available to take some of your sentimental things or official paperwork, do it. That way if he does talk/force his way in those are safe from destruction/theft.
I don’t know if your finances are intertwined in any way. If so best to separate them. Make a new account at a different bank, and move your funds over to that.