I used the term “addicted” even tho I don’t think it is that extreme, but at the same time not normal either, I have thought about this for quite a while, I do feel aroused when consuming this kind of content, but at the same time I never felt the desire or pressure to have sex, I have a pretty boring and plain life, I work from 6 pm to 6 am and then I play games, watch YouTube and read some shit, I’ve been like that since I was 14, no friends, goals or anything like that, my routine is the exact same and If I have nothing to do I will just sleep for the entire day, the point is that just now that I’m at work I came to realize the weirdness of that, how come I have no interest on dating anyone or pursuing anything like that, I mean, I have money, I can get an escort, I work 10 min close to a red light district and yet I never had the desire for that, once a crazy girl at work learned I was virgin and offered to go at my house and “fix that” and I refused, so why do I keep watching porn, I have no “voyeur” or “cuckold” fetish, I completely despise the later as I find cheating as repulsive as killing someone, there’s nothing I hate more that cheating, any kind.
Everytime I finish jerking off I get the classic “why am I doing this” and I say to myself that I don’t need that and It is the last time, I never managed to keep that promise.
, so yeah I never told this to anyone and I’m bored at work again so this is my boring story
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So why are you writing here? What advice do you seek, young padawan ?
My impression is that you have an atrophied capacity for social interaction. Life is all work and video games, porn, and sleep.
The trouble is that at some point, probably sooner than later, you will realize that you need more than that. But you will be in a social caste all by yourself. Everyone your age will have moved on, gotten married, had kids, etc etc.
My recommendation would be to start spending time with others, and learning to interact socially with them. Navigating intimacy, trust, interdependencies, is not always simple. Fortunately, people come in shapes and sizes. It’s mainly a question of finding a good friend group, and growing with them.
If it’s your pic from a year ago, you look hot and depressed
This girl probably had a little crush on you and found a perfect excuse that you rejected
You are addicted to porn and you have to give it up if you want to get anywhere.
I was there and didn’t really realize it.
There’s a free book/ebook called Easy Peasy that helped me stop.
I’m not kidding, it is an addiction, and what you describe is where I was.
Life is so much better now for me.
Seriously
You are living in a constant state of short term pleasure. You literally do nothing to work for the rewards you give yourself, you passively consume.
For the past 11 years you taught your brain that there is no need for effort if you can get some dopamine from a youtube video or from porn. The only way to change that is to force yourself into new situations. You’re walking passively through life, you have to take action in order to change that
>I used the term “addicted” even tho I don’t think it is that extreme
You were offered sex on a silver platter, and while you’re absolutely under no obligation to accept, you chose to go home and jerk off to porn instead, that’s addiction
So how is it you actually feel about this?
I’m not going to sit and say a porn addiction is good, because it obviously isn’t. But if you have no desire for sexual intimacy then that’s perfectly valid. It’s difficult to say whether that’s lack of activity itself – I doubt your job hours help here if I’m honest – or if you’re actually just asexual or averse.
Dealing with this addiction, if you choose to, is a lot about introspection. What are you getting out of it? Do you crave that intimacy or is it just because you’re bored and need an easy dopamine hit? What else could you be doing? You can wean yourself off gradually so expect to manage that behaviour, it won’t be a perfect clean slate.
You lost me at “I find cheating as repulsive as killing someone”. Sorry, but this is straight up objectively wrong.
“Am addicted to porn” “have no desire for sex”
Okay well when the cognitive disfunctions work themselves out I’ll be here. But I’m not touching that false dichotomoy with a ten foot pole!
No big deal, if anyone ever asks just say to them “nah, i do porn.”
Toppings on your side the pizza, “nah i do porn”
Losing at Scrabble? “Yeah, whatever i do porn,”
Cop pulls u over? Refuse to roll down your window “naaah mann im over it, i do porn.”