And one such case has haunted me for two years. I have two friends who didn’t know each other (friend 1 and friend 2), and one time we all went to the club together (along with another friend who we all knew, friend 3). Friend 1 was making remarks about Friend 2, such as “why does she have a weird standoffish vibe? Does she think she’s better than me?” Etc etc. this continued all night but I just ignored it and assumed she was jealous. She was mostly making these remarks to Friend 3 who I don’t think she realised was also friends with Friend 2.
A few days later I went for drinks with Friend 2 and I was being really socially awkward for unrelated reasons. After an awkward pause in conversation I panicked and said “Friend 1 called you a bitch the other day”. The second I said it, I thought what the fuck?? Why did I say that?! It’s not even true, she never called her a bitch, although she was heavily implying it.
Part of me thought Friend 2 would just laugh it off, and never see Friend 1 again so it didn’t matter. But she obsessed over it. She was obsessed with trying to work out why Friend 1 called her a bitch. And then while I was at home one night I got a call from Friend 1- “Friend 2 has just approached me in a pub and asked me if I have a problem with her!! I had to leave the pub so I didn’t fight her!! What did you say!!?” I told her I don’t know what caused that.
That’s it. To this day I’m riddled with guilt. These are two of my closest friends and every single party we go to, I am terrified they will both attend and fight and I will be exposed as a shit stirrer. Every birthday I am riddled with guilt that I can invite one but not the other.
Neither has mentioned this since then (a year ago) but I still feel so guilty. And I feel like a freak for doing that. Why would impulsively put my friend down with falsified words from another friend?? It makes me feel like a PSYCHO or something