My wife and I just lost our 4th pregnancy. We had our first 3 losses from 2020-2023 and were blessed with a baby in 2024. We just had another loss and it’s hardly been a week. It’s been emotionally draining the first 3 years and now were back to where we started, aside from having our 1 blessing. Now we have different point of views. She’s already talking about trying again, where as I’m emotionally tapped out and don’t even want to talk about trying again let along actually trying again. We have a lot to recover, both physically and mentally. The process has been depressing and I’m happy with just our 1 baby for now. Any advice is appreciated and I’m open to criticism. Before now I’ve been emotionally supportive, as much as I can be anyways. But it’s hard to fill someone else’s cup when mine’s empty.
I’m emotionally tapped out
r/Advice
Comments
You have to tell her how you feel. And you have to listen to how she feels too
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You have to be serious about how you feel about this and tell him that you are not ready to make that decision right now.
Let it help you understand it and focus on what they have now, first you have to learn to be parents and then they see that, in a few years they try again so that they are more ready
Because to be honest, the first child is always affected by the parents’ declines.
All you need to provide is the seed. If she’s ready emotionally and physically, let her be ready and support her physically but I’d also suggest going to couples counseling to help balance the emotional side.
Adoption is always another option.
If you are emotionally tapped out, speak to your wife honestly and tell her you are exhausted and want to wait a year, and that her body and mind also needs that time to recover.
Also, regarding your and your wife’s depressed emotional state, do you guys know what a staggering amount of couples can’t conceive at all?
You actually have a child, I assume a healthy one.
You are doing much better and should feel much happier than millions of childless couples.
Why are you putting yourself is such a stress when you already have a child?
Is it a religious thing?
you need to have a calm collected conversation together about how you both feel