I’m head over heels over my coworker, but she has a boyfriend. She reciprocates some signs and I’m confused.

r/

This is going to be long because it’s kind of also a vent for myself. So to start, I’m (20M) a college student who moved back home for the summer in April. I picked up a job at a restaurant, and there’s a girl (20F) there who I met early on. I feel like we clicked, and she would always make eye contact when we walked past eachother and smiled. She probably did this with others too, but sometimes it felt like she held eye contact or we made eye contact from across the restaurant as well. For the past 2 weeks, we’ve worked nearly every day together and have gotten a lot closer. We’ll be joking around and pushing eachother back and forth, throwing ice cubes in the back of each other’s shirts, and holding longgg eye contact. I’ve always had a crush on her and have looked forward to working with her, but the last 2 weeks have made me obsessed with her. I love how she talks and I love the jokes she makes and how easy it is to make her laugh. Something else that happened recently is that another coworker threw a pool party, and when everyone was taking a nap by the fire, she rested her head on my shoulder to nap, which was nice. There was one point during this where we both looked at eachother and held eye contact and our faces were so close together. I still feel my heart beating when I think about that. The problem is, I know she has a serious boyfriend from college. By serious, I’m talking him going on their family vacations. Despite this boyfriend, I can’t stop but wondering how she feels about me and if she feels anything like how I do about her. There are some weird things that you guys might be able to give insight on.

1) she’s never mentioned her boyfriend to me once. For example, I heard through the grapevine that she was going on a trip with her boyfriend soon, and when I casually asked the when she’s going on her trip, she just told me the day, not mentioning that she was going with her boyfriend or anything .

2) She didn’t seem to want to exchange social media for a while. This is weird because she had other guys from the restaurant on Instagram. I’ve casually mentioned how she should get me on Instagram and she just brushed it off, even though we both had every other person in our friend group on it. I took this as a negative. But when we did exchange socials, part of me hoped that she was hesitant because she didn’t want me to see the bf?? The day after we followed eachother, I believe she tried to talk to me more and hang around me, which I interpreted as her trying to see if I was upset by it or anything. I could be reading into it too much.

We’re both going back to college in a couple weeks and won’t see eachother likely until next summer, so idk. I’m also not an a-hole and not trying to homewreck of course. These are my questions:

1) Based off what I’ve said, does it sound like she feels something for me?
2) Do you also have any advice on if there’s anything I can do about this? Even if not now, maybe throughout the college year of next summer?

tldr: my coworker and I have been (in my eyes) flirting the whole summer, but she has a boyfriend. I really do like her and idk what to do. Does it sound like she feels smth for me? Is there anything I can do about this?

Comments

  1. RoseLure Avatar

    She definitely likes you but she’s playing with fire while holding someone else’s hand. Don’t chase a half-hearted heart if she truly wants you she’ll come back without the boyfriend in tow.

  2. JASONR1800 Avatar

    Yea she dont want to make it too obvious or give any signs to her BF.. sounds like she is into you but obviously conflicted in a serious relationship

  3. UnsubstantialGoat Avatar

    Despite how she is acting, she still has a boyfriend so that should already be a line in the sand for you.
    If she is flirting with you while already in a relationship, what is going to stop her from doing it with someone else if you two happen to get together? You reap what you sow.

  4. GymOnOne Avatar

    You’re caught in that grey area where it feels real but nothing’s actually said and that messes with your head just be careful because if she’s crossing lines with you now she might do the same to you later.

  5. Queasy-Fish1775 Avatar

    Stop flirting with her. Let her make the choice on her own free will.

  6. Avitpan Avatar

    Why did you get emotionally invested into someone who was not available?