I’m 28M. She’s 36F. We’ve been dating for 2 months. Just things together. Going out to bars, going for walks, showing her around the city (she’s new here), movie nights at hers etc. We talk all day every day through text.
She’s lovely. She treats me well. She’s great at replying. She doesn’t seem to play games. She’s kind and thoughtful and doesn’t expect me to be anything except what I am.
But. She’s 8 years older than me. And at times that makes me really anxious. She’s not someone who plans. She said she’s the sort of person who just does what feels right in the moment and doesn’t really plan. I’m the opposite. I think far ahead and want to avoid being hurt. Planning is my thing. Too much at times.
So in my mind. If we want kids. We’d have to do it asap because of her age. I don’t feel ready for that yet. She has not put pressure on me for that and has said it’s too early to know if she’d want them with me. But I can’t stop worrying about it. I don’t feel ready for them. I don’t know when I will. And it feels like it’s going to happen quickly if we decide to commit.
We aren’t committed. She said she doesn’t know me well enough for that yet. We’ve not even talked about exclusivity but I think she is kinda assuming that.
I don’t know. I’m really worried I’m gonna get in too deep then it’s too late to get out?
tl;dr worried about the implications of dating an older woman
Comments
Stop making the same post over and over again
Do you want kids? Does she?
At 28 and 36, you’re at different stages of life. Yes, 2 months is too early to decide if you see a future with someone. And whilst she’s hardly an old age pensioner, yes, she’s 36 and doesn’t have a million years to decide whether she wants kids or not. But a 36 year old woman would’ve made moves towards this by now if they really wanted children and it appears she is quite free-spirited and doesn’t feel the need to rush (which is fine).
You have to ask yourself, if having kids is seriously important to you, if this is worth pursuing longterm.
OP has been posting this every other day for weeks multiple times a day on different subs. He has been given advice numerous times. At this point it is pathetic and annoying. Get therapy.
Bro how many times do you need to post the same thing? The age difference isn’t the issue here, it’s that you are behaving in an unhinged manner. Cut her loose and see a therapist.