I have described it as “Sexy Therapy” and I’m not wrong.
I work a phone sex line, and a good chunk of guys who call me start with obvious sexual fantasies, but the calls tend to drift more toward emotional issues: I’m always happy to go back to the fantasy, but when the guys start pouring their hearts out, they’re no longer interested in the sex part. They really just want someone with whom they can talk.
They want softness, kindness, understanding, and empathy. I feel so bad these guys think they need to pay to have this; I’m happy to provide, and luckily I do have a background in mental health, so I’m not just flailing out of pocket. But, man, as a woman (Shania Twain “Let’s go girls” voice), I know how much easier it is for me to have emotional comfort and reliability simply because of how I was both born and raised. It’s really not fair.
There’s one guy I’ve been working with who lives across the pond from me, and it’s obvious he wants connection: I feel like he is happy with scraps, whereas I want to make sure he gets what he needs, not just the bare minimum. But he doesn’t know how to even ask for that. Maybe he doesn’t realize he can?
I just…I dunno. I want my Sexy Therapy to make people’s lives actively better, and not just paper over stuff.
Comments
I did the same working for a gay sex phone line in my 20s and discovered the same thing, it was always about connecting with someone.
Sex lines are still a thing?
Now that’s a creative way to make the world a better place, I love it.