My boyfriend (21M) is the sweetest boy I’ve ever met, and our relationship has been amazing so far. I(19F) love him sooo much, and we have great communication.
However, I’ve also noticed there are a few imbalances in this relationship. I feel like I just do more and need more. Emotionally speaking, I had to ask him (nicely, of course) to make more effort, because I’ve offered him flowers, gifts, I reply quickly, I’m always there for him when he needs me, I’ve written him love letters… I’m very expressive and demonstrative when it comes to showing my affection, and I kind of expected the same from him but it’s not always the case.
And honestly, it’s fine. I know not everybody expresses love the same way I do, and I know we’re both busy and he doesn’t always have time to answer my messages. Plus, he’s made efforts since we talked about it, which I really appreciated. I know he loves me, and I feel the same way.
BUT of course, there’s something else: sx.
My libido is quite high, but his is not so much. I feel very frustrated and like I have no control whatsoever over our sx life, because it’s always when he wants to do it that we do it. Even when he wants to and I’m not really in the mood, I still go along with it. I know it’s not fair to expect the same in return, but since my libido is way higher, I’m left unsatisfied anyway, lol.
I feel like I’m always waiting , waiting for him to agree to have sx, waiting for him to send a message, etc. Of course, I’ve never pressured him into doing anything he doesn’t want to do. We had a conversation about it this morning. He said it wasn’t my fault, and I didn’t do anything wrong, he just has a low libido sometimes.
The thing is, we can’t see each other often, and when we finally do, he still doesn’t want to do it. And honestly, it makes me feel undesirable. We still have sx sometimes, but it’s just not enough for me. I know for sure he’s not cheating or anything. Maybe we’re just not made for each other?
He said he doesn’t want to lose me and doesn’t want to break up (I don’t want that either). I even brought up the idea of opening the relationship, but he said no. I feel like there’s just no solution.
TL;DR; : I’m frustrated emotionally and physically with my boyfriend, and there’s just nothing I can do about it.
What should I do?