I feel under pressure and it just feels like a chore
Worried about sex faces
I sometimes fart during orgasm because of how tight everything clenches and then releases (I feel like I’m the only one please tell me I’m not 😭💀)
And my suction vibrator can give me a far better orgasm than any man or woman ever could
I do enjoy the rest of the stuff and still being touched and pounded which I can’t do myself
But does not wanting to orgasm with a partner weird? Am I missing out?
I read so much that pushes women to chase sexual satisfaction in that way during sex but I feel odd for preferring not to 😢
Comments
trying to come from clitoral stimulation is to me, sometimes like solving a math problem mentally. so sometimes i don’t want the hassle and i wanna just feel close to my man and be done when he is
Sounds like you’re afraid to lose control with another person and yes when you allow yourself to be that vulnerable and give yourself over to someone else giving you pleasure, it’s pretty great. The physical sensation isn’t that much different but the mental release is better IMO. Wondering what you would do if you saw a sex partner’s “sex face” or they accidentally farted? Hopefully you would be cool about it? I’ve farted during sex before and the guy didn’t say anything and just kept going, pretty sure it was forgotten about in 3 seconds
Normal or not, it sounds like you gave a lot of anxiety around sex. To be clear, it’s a perfectly reasonable thing to have a lot of anxiety around. There’s a lot of vulnerability at play. I might suggest talking to someone about that anxiety. It may be a small part of something bigger that might benefit from unpacking.
As an aside, chasing orgasms as the be all end all of sex is also not all the fun it’s cropped up to be. Sex has many forms, some are transient slow burns, others are intense and mind blowing. Forcing one of them on as a goal though, is an easy way to amplify anxiety and discomfort and pressure on both yourself and your partner.
As to farts, they happen. You learn to laugh it off. Sex can be funny and weird and gross sometimes, but if you focus on the shared intimacy, weirdness just ends up being an enjoyable part of it. And if it kind of cools off the session, that’s okay too.
It might also be worth having a talk with your partner about the anxieties you feel – see if they’re willing to offer support or reassurance.
Let yourself give over to the pleasure. Believe me, your orgasm face isn’t going to send anyone running. (If they notice. They’re likely occupied elsewhere.)
As for the farting. It happens on occasion. A chuckle and, “That’s one way to blow me a kiss.” Or ignore it completely. That will really depend on the partner. It’s no big deal.
Relax and enjoy. This is the last time in the world to be worried.
I can reach the finish line by myself any day of the week. The satisfaction of helping someone else reach the finish line requires a partner. Im not lacking in orgasms. Im lacking in human connection. Sex is still fun, sensual, romantic, comfortable, and pleasurable without the peak. But I want my partner to assume that I do, and I’ll let them know if its something I need or not this time.
Sex is about trust.
That doesn’t just mean letting a partner in physically, you need to communicate with your partner.
Have you tried having your partner wear a blindfold?
Nothing consensual and involving human adults is weird if works for the people involved in it. If it’s not something you’re interested in experiencing with someone else, that’s fine.
Everyone farts. Your partner should take it as a compliment. If they don’t, then get a different one.
“Normal” (what does that even mean?) or not, does it bother you? Are you feeling unsatisfied and left on edge afterwards because of this or did you have a good time anyway and could happily go on with your day?
I personally find letting go of the expectation that either or both of us necessarily have to “finish” to be quite freeing.
It differs. Most impt is enjoy the process
Sex is 95% mental. Anxiety and pressure will kill a potential orgasm every time, no matter anything else. It’s easier for you to get yourself off because you’re not in your head worrying if a partner will judge you. That alone will make an enormous difference.
People are messy and make weird faces. If you’re having sex with someone who might judge you for these totally normal, human things, I would suggest having sex with someone else instead! Sex is way better with someone you can be truly vulnerable with.
I don’t know, for me it’s not worth the headache. I have cervical spine issues and an orgasm can give me a headache that lasts days. It’s literally not worth the headache 🤣
Personally, to me this seems indeed a bit odd.
With a trusted person I love the feeling of completely letting go. Orgasms together in some form are way better to me than the release alone. Masturbation is a quick, little “poof”, while climaxing with my husband is like an explosion leaving me shaking. No comparison!
Your orgasm face isn’t bad. The sounds you may or may not make are fine. Farting isn’t the end of the world. And being comfortable with yourself and your partner to enjoy sexuality to the fullest is a great feeling!
Yet it’s obviously fine if you don’t want that or don’t have that level of comfort and trust. Do what’s good for you!