I am currently buying a house, a long-time goal that I’ve been working towards before I met my girlfriend (30F). We’ve been together for over 2 years (yes my house search has taken that long!). However, things have been a bit rocky in our relationship, we’ve broke up and got back together several times over the year – when I say breakup I mean for about a week then I manage to resolve things – and at the moment we both feel unsure about our future together – but we are trying.
Anyways – she’s never been sure on where she wants to be based long term, and she knows I’d prefer to stay in my current city. We currently live 45~ mins drive away, she has no desire to live where she is right now as it’s a small village, whereas my current place is a city, but she’s waiting for the right job opportunity to appear (not necessarily in my city).
Recently, we had a pretty rough breakup which lasted nearly 2 months. During which I had viewed a property that I really liked. But during this we rekindled and in the first few days of getting back together I had an offer accepted on that house. The reason I got back together was she started to say how she was committed to me, and she’d be ready to meet my parents formally. She already knew of my plan to buy a house, and throughout my search she’s been sending links to potential properties and suggestions on how the house could be laid out etc. But when I’ve asked her about the whole idea she keeps insisting that’s not for her to decide, but at the same time shows signs of support in a way where she offers suggestions on the house.
Now that I’ve had the house offer accepted, it feels weird that I’m now about to purchase it when my GF has pretty much no involvement. I don’t mean any financial or legal support – I just wish she was excited about the house and said shed be open to moving in when the time is right. Since our relationship is so fragile this also means there’s no plans for her to move in, mainly because she only wants to relocate should she find a suitable role equal or better than her current role. The only thing she’s said is she’d travel much more often to see me, atm we only meet at her place since I live with my parents. I want to buy the house for my own independence away from my parents, where I could build a future here, not just starting a family but also it would greatly help my business, but at the same time I’m confused if I’m making the right decision when our relationship is so fragile
TL;DR –
Girlfriend of 2.5 years and I have had a bumpy journey but says she’s ready to commit to our relationship. Should I continue buying my dream home solo or pull out of the home as she decides where she wants to live?
Comments
You guys can’t even stay in the relationship for more than what, a couple of months? What about that says “yes we’re stable and should buy a house together?”