Hi so im a 17 yr old female and i live with my parents still ofc and i am the youngest of my siblings (theres 4 of us and all my siblings have moved out) but recently these past few years since i was about 10-now me and my parents have have quite a few hard ships through out with my anxiety depression SH and addiction. (i am 15 months sober now no thanks to them lol) but even so my parents still dont trust me a bunch which i fully understand but ive had my room taken away from me not like my door being taken off but i mean my door is locked from the outside with tape on it so my parents know if i was in there and im now sleeping in the hallway on a mattress anyways Id be incredibly understanding if i was still having a hard time with my addiction but its been about a year and maybe 6 months or 7 months anywho ive always asked why i dont have my room and the reasoning behind it was because i didnt clean it before school (which again is understandable if it was a regular occurance i had been awake since 5 am to 3am studying for my finals as im in a early nursing program and i was in a rush to get to school so yes i shouldve cleaned my room before so that is my fault lol) anyways back to my original question is this normal? is it normal for parents to take their kids room and make them sleep in the hallway? because i will tell other people about it jst normally (bc it is my normal lmfao ive always had my room taken) and people look at me sideways but then again sometimes people say that its normal so what are your guys thoughts? is this normal or am i being crazy? (if you guys want more context or a few more things that are my “normal” i will surely tell you so you can all know the best way to answer THANK YOU IN ADVANCE AND PLEASE GIVE ANY ADVICE ID LOVE THAT
Is it weird to get my room taken from me as a 17 yr old? Am I being crazy? Im very curious about this
r/Advice
Comments
You’re 1 year away from adulthood and have no adult skills.
You have failed to take your life seriously and your parents have failed to correct you.
Until you leave the house, you are their responsibility. They should do anything in their power to teach you to be an adult.
You have shown that when given any amount of freedom, you make terrible decisions.
No it’s not weird. They are in danger of being failures as parents.
No, it’s not normal. In fact, I would call it abuse but it’s unfortunately not illegal. It sounds like you’re in a good place right now as far as the path you’re on academically and with your sobriety. Keep up the good work so that you can get yourself out of that house and out from under their thumb ASAP.
It’s not normal, but do you think it’s because they are overwhelmed and don’t know how else to keep you safe from yourself?
Have you tried having a conversation with them about how you can earn back their trust and your privacy?
It isn’t normal for almost a year and a half to sleep on a mattress in the hallway. One thing if your parents can’t afford it and you were sleeping at a family members house but another if your just like house you mentioned. Ask your parents to have a conversation about it and be truthful and honest and tell them how you will maintain your living spaces and talk about you being sober for a year and a half. Let them see how they can trust you. In their case they need to see in order to believe. Then keep doing well in school so you can get on in your career and get your own place. You can do it!! Also, if you are close to any of your siblings. Ask them to help. Maybe your parents dealt with the same with your other sibling and they are reacting from fear and them not knowing what to do.
You have a history of SH and addiction at 15. I think there is more going on than what you are describing from your parents point of view.
It is not normal, but you need to work on you and communication skills ( as well as your parents)
I worry about you when you leave home. Are you prepared to deal with adulthood?
It’s not ‘normal,’ but even your quick outline of your past 7 years makes it clear that you’ve all been through a LOT, and they’re trying to keep you on track somehow. So talk to them, clean the damn room, keep working at it. You don’t need a bunch of strangers who don’t know 99% of the story criticizing your parents for you.
No, not normal. The only other parent that I’ve heard of doing this is Ruby Franke, a YouTuber who is in prison for child abuse
It’s time to make a call to CPS..
It’s not only not normal it’s abusive
Ruby Franke was sent to prison for shit like that
Will any of your siblings take you in?
Im considering being a foster parent and the number one requirement for your home is that the kid will have their own room with a window and door that closes.
This is not ok or normal.
Not normal at all
It’s very unusual. I would have a meeting with your parents and your doctor and see what they say.
While it’s unusual, severe anxiety, addiction and self harm in a 15-year-old is also unusual . It might be a self harm safety thing, although I’d like to think they would just take turns sleeping in a cot in your room with you. Locking your door so you can’t be in there unsupervised as also consistent with monitoring you for self harm
Yeah this is considered abuse give cps a call they would be very interested to know
It sounds like you have had a really rough number of years (the better part of a decade) and have dealt with some very non-trivial challenges.
Most parents love their children more deeply than those children realize. Yes, there are exceptions. But they are generally rare. Parents are also flawed people (just like you) and sometimes make poor decisions. But they generally try to do what they think is best for their children.
Talk to your parents. What are your parents’ concerns? Did you attempt suicide or almost OD in your room before and now they are (understandably) afraid to let you have the privacy needed to do yourself harm?
I think it would be great to get some outside advice from somewhere other than Reddit. Through all of the struggles, have you seen a counselor? A doctor? Is there someone that you and your parents can turn to for professional advice?
Do your parents love you? Only you can answer that. If so, then they might be making poor decisions, but they have your best interests at heart. Try to navigate through this with them and the help of a professional.