I’ve been unemployable for years. I’m 40 and happily married.

r/

This is not a secret amongst my peers, but I do feel the need to talk about it, because it still bugs me. I graduated from college in 2012 with an AA in graphic design, but had little work experience, and was thus afraid to enter the corporate space.

I spent the next four years taking on menial jobs, each ending in disaster as I had trouble following directions, work slowly, and get confused and upset easily. A one month stint at UPS in 2014 caused the development of hemorrhoids, which despite treatment causes me a lot of pain and has hindered employment significantly.

Feeling backed into a corner, and still terrified of the corporate world, I became an
entrepreneur, which I failed at for about five years. It was very demoralizing to have failed at every attempt at securing income, trying desperately to conform and being unable to.

These days, I’m a house husband. My lovely wife is the breadwinner and, on good days, she comes home to a well-kept abode. On bad days, I just sort of lay down and wait for the chronic pain to subside so I can start cleaning/doing chores/running errands. Sometimes it takes 6 to 8 hours after waking to face the day, due to the unending aches and pains. I spend a lot of time looking after my health, as there are a lot of mental/physical issues that I work on so I can improve myself.

No one gives me any shit about my position in life. I appreciate that. But having failed at every artistic/income endeavor is a bit embarrassing. I’m extremely grateful I have a great spouse, but I also wanted to make something of myself rather than being a prisoner in my own home. Such is life.

Comments

  1. Medusa-1701 Avatar

    Being chronically ill and disabled, though, is a big part of the reason why. And that is not your fault or in your control. Believe me, I know. I am in a similar position.

  2. nomoremrniceguy100 Avatar

    Interesting story, thank you for sharing. Can you say more about the nature of your chronic pain/disability/mental and physical issues? 

  3. Steepsee Avatar

    There have been times in my life where I struggled with this, and sometimes I’ve felt sad about it. And then I remember that my father was very successful, achieved every professional goal he ever set for himself, made a lot of money, and he was still so miserable he drank himself to death.

    A good career would be nice, but you can’t overvalue just simply being content in your life.

  4. better360 Avatar

    Is this confusion caused by ADHD?

  5. Psychological-Try343 Avatar

    Have you not sought any mental health treatment at all? 

  6. kaylovve1 Avatar

    Well if it works for yall good then do yall have kids ? Or you just a house husband to the home

  7. catbamhel Avatar

    Check out Tanner Murtagh on YouTube.

  8. IsuckneedhelpT_T Avatar

    It’s not embarrassing. What’s embarrassing is living in a society that makes you think you’re worth less if you’re not providing profit to someone. I’m glad you have a good spouse and friends that understand you.

  9. Jackeltree Avatar

    Is it just hemorrhoids that causing chronic pain? Have you had surgery on them?