Life if very strange and sometimes some things you just know about your self and don’t want to admit it but you have to, I’m here today writing this because I don’t feel like anyone in my life would even care to listen to how I feel and I am very much disgusted by making others feel pity for me. I feel it’s better to share this here where no one knows me or even knows if this is a real person. I’m not here for sympathy or answers, the things I already know about myself I have reflected on and I can’t seem to shake off the feeling that if things don’t change I know more likely than not I am gonna die by suicide with a bullet straight through my head it’s a little shameful knowing I have come to terms with it knowing that it’s wrong I am so numb it’s jarring it’s frustrating for all of 2 seconds then I yearn for feelings ones I wish I could express. I know I’m not crazy and yes I know how contradictory that sounds coming from a person that has come to terms with taking their own life.
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Please call crisis services in your area. They will be able to listen to what you have to say and suggest ways to get some help.